Remembering Ruby

Thanks For Visiting!

2011-03-19T09:22:00.004-05:00

When we lost our beloved family beagle to cancer at the age of 13 in 2003, I wrote a children's book as part of the grieving process. Remembering Ruby: For Families Living Beyond the Loss of a Pet was a labor of love for my entire family, including my sister Julie, who designed the cover and interior, and generally kept me from going insane during the publishing process (and continues that caring spirit to this day!). My husband and kids have been great sports on this wild ride, and have given maximum support every step of the way (thanks, guys!).

I created this blog to document the publishing process, the excitement of having this lasting memorial to our dog actually available to help others, and the trials and tribulations of marketing this book from my own neighborhood to places on the other side of the world.

You can search through the archives if you'd like, but my favorite part of this site is "Lessons Learned From The Life Of A Princess Dog", which is Bijoux's story. The posts are listed in order in the sidebar.

This book makes a lovely gift for families with young children who have to say goodbye to a beloved, furry family member. To purchase the book on Amazon, click here.

A Dog's Purpose

2010-07-10T21:02:00.003-05:00

I usually despise e-mail forwards, but my Dad sent me a really lovely one (I don't know the original source) and I thought I'd post it here:

"Being a veterinarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year-old Irish Wolfhound named Belker. The dog's owners, Ron, his wife Lisa, and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker, and they were hoping for a miracle.

I examined Belker and found he was dying of cancer. I told the family we couldn't do anything for Belker, and offered to perform the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in their home.

As we made arrangements, Ron and Lisa told me they thought it would be good for six-year-old Shane to observe the procedure. They felt as though Shane might learn something from the experience.

The next day, I felt the familiar catch in my throat as Belker 's family surrounded him. Shane seemed so calm, petting the old dog for the last time, that I wondered if he understood what was going on. Within a few minutes, Belker slipped peacefully away.

The little boy seemed to accept Belker's transition without any difficulty or confusion. We sat together for a while after Belker's Death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives.

Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, 'I know why.'

Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next stunned me. I'd never heard a more comforting explanation. It has changed the way I try and live.

He said,'People are born so that they can learn how to live a good life -- like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?' The six-year-old continued,

'Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay as long.'

Live simply.

Love generously.

Care deeply.

Speak kindly.

Remember, if a dog was the teacher you would learn things like:

When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.

Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.

Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.

Take naps.

Stretch before rising.

Run, romp, and play daily.

Thrive on attention and let people touch you.

Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.

On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.

On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.

When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.

Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.

Be loyal.

Never pretend to be something you're not.

If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.

When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by, and nuzzle them gently.

ENJOY EVERY MOMENT OF EVERY DAY!"

Happy Birthday, Bijoux.

2010-02-02T07:11:00.001-06:00

The late, great Bijoux was born twenty years ago today. Our family has gone on with our lives, of course, but the impact she made on us, especially Jim and me, will be felt forever. So much love.

One of my favorite lines to use when someone asks me to sign one of my books is some form or another of this:

"I read once that memories are like photographs on the heart...she'll be with you forever; all you have to do is remember."

I'm remembering so much today. I'm so thankful that she was a part of our lives for thirteen years.

Full Heart

2009-10-21T10:09:00.004-05:00

In my last post here, ages ago (well, in June), I linked to another blogger's tribute to her dog, Sadie, who had recently passed. At the time, I didn't know that blogger; I just knew of her.

Six weeks later, I met Secret Agent Mama (who has a real name, too: Mishi!) at the BlogHer conference. I was thrilled to spend the afternoon with her and two others at a watering hole near the Sears Tower, and we got to know each other. I'm so glad that we did. We became friends and now keep in touch.

I sent her a copy of Remembering Ruby to share with her kids.

A few weeks ago, Mishi sent me the link to something her daughter Olivia had written in tribute to Sadie. Apparently my book inspired her to write it. I was deeply humbled; I initially wrote my book for my own family, but hoped that it would help others work through their grief (especially children!). I have said since its publication that I just wanted to "help one kid through it". I've been told on a couple occasions that my book did help a youngster cope with their loss, and Olivia's well-written tribute seals it for me: I did what I came to do.

Now I'm feeling greedy. I hope this book helps hundreds of kids.

I want to thank Mishi for sharing Olivia's work with me!

Also, a note to Olivia: You are a wonderful writer, Olivia! Keep it up; I look forward to reading more of your work someday!

Sadie

2009-06-05T09:36:00.002-05:00

I was directed by a friend to this heartbreakingly beautiful post about Sadie, and I wanted to share it with you.

Click here.

If you have blogged a tribute to a pet or know someone who has, please pass it on to me; I may post a link to it here.

Remembering Ruby Hits Television!

2008-12-13T13:03:00.005-06:00

My friend Kim Martucci, meteorologist at WUSA-9 in Washington DC, was kind enough to put the book on the air this morning! Thanks Kim, I really, REALLY appreciate it. The link to her blog entry about it (including the tv clip!) is here!

Remembering Ruby Reviewed By...A Dog!

2008-12-12T06:34:00.002-06:00

That's the best kind of review, right?

I'm happy to say that Harry the Pug (whose master is Shawna Coronado, "The Casual Gardener" and author of Gardening Nude, a guide to getting green, getting involved in your community, and helping the earth) gave the book five wags.

Read the review here!

A Familiar Feeling Tribute

2008-08-28T10:19:00.007-05:00

Yes, it's been months since I've updated this. Sorry about that. I have had big plans for posts, but little time to do it right. Soon, hopefully.

In the meantime, Duke and Inky, beloved pets of two of my friends, have passed on. Their losses are felt deeply and although I know that the grieving process will be difficult as it runs its course for my friends, Duke and Inky will live on forever in the hearts of those who loved them.

I also want to post a video that I think I have been putting off watching, but finally did today. My sister sent me the link to it back in DECEMBER after she discovered it on Dooce's website. It is long, almost eleven minutes. It is sad. You will cry that ugly cry, the one that makes you all blotchy. (I did; I'm a total mess.) But if you have ever loved and lost a dog, the feelings portrayed in the film will ring extremely familiar.

It is a Japanese short film and is from a compilation of short films from 2005 called "All About My Dog".

Now I'm Really Out There...

2008-06-17T06:54:00.001-05:00

Oh my.

I was just checking the stats on this blog and discovered via the referral information that the interview I did with Dogcast Radio is now "out there". YIKES!

So...if you want to take a listen, go here.

Many thanks to Julie of Dogcast: she is truly a delight! It was great speaking with you!

A Lovely Tribute!

2008-05-02T11:28:00.002-05:00

After recently winning a copy of my book, Jules at Just Because took the time to write a beautiful Haiku about it for Haiku Friday. I am honored that she did it and appreciate it so much! To read it, click here.

Thanks Jules!! You're awesome!

Contest Winners!

2008-04-13T22:14:00.003-05:00

Thanks to my sister who has a Mac and can take a screen shot: she did the random "drawing" for me! The winners of the free books are Kelli, Jules, and Snerg! My plan is to change the body of the contest post (in the next few days as I get a spare moment!) and make it into a lasting memorial where others can add their stories.

I really, really appreciate your stories, everyone. I love reading about the great love other people have for their pets, and your stories really touched me, so thanks!

An Anniversary Contest!

2008-04-05T11:38:00.003-05:00

I realized shortly after I got up this morning that today marks five years exactly (it was even on a Saturday) since Bijoux has been gone. In so many ways it doesn't feel like it's been that long but at the same time, so much has happened in my life that it seems longer than five years.

This dog was such a blessing in my life, and I think about her often. I am so very glad that I wrote the book, that I had that year of working closely with my sister on its design, and that the finished product is not only something that I'm proud of but that it is a great lasting memorial to this beautiful animal.

I thought that today would be a great time to do a couple of things. One is, I finally organized the blog entries of my essay collection, "Lessons Learned from the Life of a Princess Dog" so they would be easily accessible to everyone who visits this blog. You can click on any or all of them down there in the margin.

Also, in honor of this anniversary, I decided to give away three copies of my book. All you have to do to enter is leave a comment here, telling a short story about a late, great pet who impacted your life. Think of it as creating your own little memorial, right here!

The contest will run through next Saturday, April 12 at 11:59 p.m. I will use a random number generator to choose the winners! Please leave your e-mail address with your comment so I don't have to chase you around if you win.

I hope that, in stopping in here and entering the contest, you will also read some of what I have posted here. Please keep my book in mind, and I'd also appreciate it if you can spread the word about it! Thanks so much!

Now, read...and enter! I look forward to reading all of your stories!

Thanks, ODU!

2008-04-05T10:00:00.000-05:00

My alma mater, Old Dominion University, gave me a little ink in the most recent issue of the alumni magazine...

You can click here to take a look!

Many Thanks (and "Cheers!") to My Friends in the UK

2008-03-07T20:51:00.003-06:00

I received an e-mail a couple of weeks ago from Beverley Cuddy, editor of Dogs Today Magazine in the United Kingdom. She asked me if I had picked up a current copy of the magazine, because Remembering Ruby was mentioned! I had not looked for it because there is a future review scheduled for somewhere down the pipeline. Apparently a Lovely Woman named Karen who is a colleague of Beverley's arranged the book blurb (with cover photo!) and wasn't aware of Beverley's future plans for the book's appearance in the magazine.

I really, really appreciate Karen's giving my book some press (THANK YOU!!), and I really appreciate Beverley for sending me a copy of the magazine (AND THANKS TO YOU!!)! I am so thankful for my United Kingdom friends!

Look Up To THIS Hero, Kids: Her Name is Haley Ham

2008-02-23T13:16:00.006-06:00

I wanted to call attention to a young girl who took a tragedy and turned it into something that will cause widespread change.

Her name is Haley Ham. My mom actually brought her to my attention a couple of months ago, because the woman my mom works for asked if I could sign one of my books to Haley, who--I think--is a friend of her family.

To summarize what happenned, Haley lost her two beloved dogs because someone gave them a concoction that contained things that were toxic to dogs, mainly antifreeze. She was, obviously, devastated and wanted to make sure this didn't happen to anyone else. There were no laws in her homestate of Tennessee that required manufactureres to put a bitter tasting additive into antifreeze to discourage animals from drinking it, and Haley made it her mission to educate others and try to help get legislation passed to make that happen.

And she did it.

Did I mention that Haley is 11 years old?

The news story says it all better than I do, so read this first, and then this, and then this.

I received a couple of lovely e-mails from Haley's mom, who is--while also heartbroken over their terrible loss--so very proud (and rightfully so!) of her daughter.

My heart is warmed by learning of young people like Haley. One person really can make change.

Open Heart, Open Mind

2008-02-19T06:48:00.004-06:00

Lesson Number 17: A Faint Heart Never a True Love Knows

I soon found that although Bijoux can never be replaced, I longed to have another dog in the house. Jim said that he always expected that I would have a change in heart: I’m too much of a “dog person”. The idea of bringing another dog into our family didn’t thrill him, and until we discussed it more I definitely didn’t want to say anything to the kids. Jim reminded me that he hadn’t been very excited about bringing Bijoux home, but he loved her after we took the plunge. After much discussion, Jim told me that my desire to get another dog was much greater than his desire not to get one, and he was sure that, as it was with Bijoux, he would enjoy a new dog as well. There just had to be some rules:

• No sleeping in our bed
• No jumping on the furniture
• No people food
• No getting a new dog until my book about Bijoux was complete

Of course, more rules could be negotiated as time went on. I was so happy that Jim was willing to go forward with this. The kids had been telling me that they missed Bijoux and wanted to get another dog. Jason even asked for a bird. I reminded them that Bijoux couldn’t be replaced, and that we would get another dog someday, but I had a book to finish, first. Jim and I wanted to give us all enough time and space from April 5, 2003 to be able to enjoy a new puppy, and now—over one year later—I am very glad that we did it this way.

As I did with Bijoux, I came up with a name for our new, soon-to-be-coming-home puppy without having seen her first. Her name will be Roxie. Of course, there is a story behind her name. About one month after Bijoux’s death, I took Dylan and several other fifth graders to the Humane Society. The fifth graders collected needed supplies for the HS as a community service project. Our group delivered the donations, and I asked the woman who worked there if we could have a tour. She obliged, and took us right over to the “cat room”. Not being a “cat person”, I wasn’t thrilled. I asked about dogs, and she said, “Sure, I’ll show you where the dogs are, but we only have one that’s available right now.” We followed her into the room across the hall and took a look at Jake, an adorable black mutt. As the kids were talking to Jake (and Dylan was commanding him to “Sit!”), I ventured to the other end of the room, where there was, indeed, another dog. I didn’t recognize the type of dog, but she was so sweet. I looked at the tag on her cage, and was pleasantly surprised. Her name was “Roxie”, and she was a Beagle/German Shepherd mix. (I took this as another sign from Bijoux, by the way!) I thought Roxie would be a perfect name for a new puppy: I liked that both Roxie and Bijoux had an “X”, and this sign at the Humane Society came in to me loud and clear.

I told Jim about my experience, and he humored me. Sitting around the dinner table some months later, I was telling the kids how we would name our new dog Roxie. Dylan lobbied to get the name changed to “Jakeina”, because he was stuck on little Jake at the Humane Society, but I told him no. Out of the blue, Jim said, “I know what her middle name should be: Susie.” I was so touched by this that my eyes started to tear up.

And so we switched gears and got mentally ready for Roxie Susie Wells. I am ready to take the leap. Open heart, open arms, welcoming a new relationship. It’s the biggest lesson that I truly learned from Bijoux, the Original Princess Dog.

Thanks To Whoever is Responsible...

2008-02-13T13:10:00.004-06:00

Pet Health Store

Hey! This blog just got nominated for an award at Petwellbeing.com! I have no idea who nominated it/me, but thank you so much! I got to put up a cute little badge over there to the side.

Apparently the awards program ends in September, so keep your fingers crossed for me because I can definitely use more exposure!

I'm back soon with the final essay, and hopefully other news if I can get some more things percolating!

Looking For Her Everywhere; Finding Her in My Heart

2008-01-27T16:36:00.001-06:00

Lesson Number Sixteen: There is Life After Death, If You Believe

The first thing I did after she died was put together a little photo album. I spent an entire evening digging through many of our family pictures from the thirteen years before and pulled out many photos of Bijoux. There were photos from her first night home, including my favorite one of her laying on top of Jim. He was on his back on our kitchen floor, and she was sprawled out on him, her paws towards his face. She was looking at me (I took the picture while I was laying on the floor also, but I was at Jim’s head, looking at Bijoux straight on) while she had a knotted-up sock hanging out of her mouth. Not only do I love the photo just because of how cute she looked, but it was also quite colorful, as Jim was wearing a red, white, and blue t-shirt that we purchased during the INXS “Kick” concert tour very recently.

The other pictures that "begged" to be included were some from Bijoux’s first birthday party, a photo of Bijoux standing (all four legs) on top of an end table in the living room, a picture of the toddler Dylan kissing her, and of course, the pictures from the day before her death. This photo album did make me cry, but it also made me laugh.

As I looked at her “super-sized” light blue water dish, I couldn’t figure out what to do with it. It was made of a heavy duty plastic, and seemed such a substantial thing to throw away, but I couldn’t imagine that I would be able to find anyone who’d want it, either. To pack it away in a box would be equally unreasonable. After some thought, I finally decided that I would plant some flowers in it. It was a nice way to recycle and remember at the same time!

The other activity I chose to engage in was writing a book about Bijoux. I learned so much from this little animal—there was so much give and take—that I felt I could honor her by writing about her.

Over the next week, I used a regular notebook to jot down a phrase that would jog my memory about every single thing I could remember about Bijoux. Although the initial purpose for writing everything down was the book, the act of making all of these notes actually helped my state of mind in a major way. When I finished writing everything I could, I felt enormously better.

On Friday, six days after Bijoux’s death, I left the house at 4:30 a.m. as usual, to teach my spin class. Driving down I-88, I was singing along with a song on the radio. A commercial followed, and I switched station. I was thrilled to hear a song that I hadn’t heard in a very, very long time. Suddenly, as I sang along, it occurred to me that it was “What You Need” by INXS, the group which we had seen in concert just before we brought Bijoux home—the group whose shirt Jim was wearing in that favorite photo of mine. I knew the song well, but felt as if I was hearing the lyrics for the very first time that morning. The words (copyright INXS) brought me to tears:

"Hey, here is the story
Forget about the trouble in life
Don't you know, it's not easy
When you gotta walk upon that line

That's why - You need
That's why - This is what you need
I'll give you what you need

Don't you get sad and lonely
You need a change from
What you do all day
Ain't no sense in all your crying
Just pick it up and throw it into shape

Hey you, won't you listen
This is not the end of it all
Don't you see there is a rhythm
I'll take you where you
Really need to be"

I find that there are two types of people in the world: people who believe that things happen for a reason, and people who deny any sense of mysticism or fate—they claim that whatever has mysteriously occurred is “strictly coincidence”. When I was younger, I would have belonged in the second group of people. However, as I have experienced more and more of life, my beliefs tend to fall into the former category. Depending upon which camp you’re in and how badly you like to argue about the ways of the world, this is where it could be possible to find comfort.

As I went through my day that Friday, completely excited because I felt as if I “got a sign” from Bijoux saying that she was okay, about half of the people I reported this to looked at me like I was completely nuts. I didn’t care, though: I felt so good. In order to recover from the grief I was experiencing, I grasped at anything that could be taken as a sign from Bijoux. Strangely, after not hearing “What You Need” on the radio for so long—perhaps years, or had I just not noticed it? —I heard it many times over the next two to three weeks.

One particularly spooky experience happened on a day when I was driving my car around a Naperville neighborhood, with a co-worker in the front passenger seat and Dylan and Jason in the back seat (school had let out for the day). We were distributing flyers for work and spent about an hour driving through residential areas that were close to the health club.

We turned a corner onto a new street, and noticed that there was a beagle whose leash was tied up in front of the second house on the right. The dog was adorable, and sleeping. Just as we drove by, his eyes popped open and he sat up, wagging his tail as he stared at us. A few minutes after that, “What You Need” came on the radio. We had to turn around eventually and pass the beagle’s house again, and when we did, he was still sitting there wagging his tail at us. Dylan and Jason got a kick out of this, and always listened for “Bijoux’s song” on the radio; I think it made them feel better, too.

Time heals all, they say, and something happened that I never dreamed would. I always said that I would never get another dog. After I spent the last several years of Bijoux’s life being on edge about her eventual death, and then actually going through those painful last months, weeks, days, hours, and minutes, I didn’t want to put my heart and soul “out there” for another dog. But another major wave of change was on its way.

The Toughest Decision, Ever.

2008-01-25T06:54:00.001-06:00

Lesson Number Fifteen: If You Love Someone, Set Them Free part three

In the first week of April 2003, Bijoux’s rapid breathing was happening even when she was sleeping. We decided that the following Saturday—April 5—would be the day that we would have her put down. It was the day I had been dreading for years.

When we made that decision, we also decided not to tell Dylan and Jason what was going to happen until it got closer. It was a rough week. On Friday, I loaded the camera with film before the kids got home from school. After they put their backpacks down and got settled, I suggested that we take some pictures with Bijoux. Though it was very difficult, I am so happy that we did it. I kept telling myself how lucky we were to have this opportunity. I took several pictures of Dylan and Jason sitting next to Bijoux on that Pottery Barn rug, which was the perfect accessory for the photos. Dylan told me that he really didn’t feel like smiling, and I told him that it was okay, he didn’t have to. It was just heartbreaking.

After I took the shots I wanted, Dylan told me he wanted to take one of me with Bjioux. I got down onto the rug and laid down behind her, wrapping my arm around her and pulling her face toward mine. Dylan snapped the picture, and then another one. I took the camera from him and finished the roll that day, so that I could take the film to be developed immediately.

That evening when Jim got home, we wanted to tell the kids what was going on right away, so that it wouldn’t be too close to bedtime when they heard the news. We sat them down again and told them that we would be taking Bijoux to the vet the next day and that she wouldn’t be returning home with us. We told them in very vague terms what was going to happen. They were, understandably, sad, but it was a lot for them to try at their young ages to comprehend.

The next day, Saturday April 5, I was scheduled to teach my 7:15 spin class and then to work. It was all I could do to get through the workout and then work at my desk in the membership department quietly for the morning. Naturally my thoughts were elsewhere, and I was exhausted from not sleeping much. Julie and my parents were coming to say goodbye to Bijoux, and I wanted to spend some time alone with her as well, so I left work around noon.

Jim was working in the garage when I arrived. I entered the house and Bijoux was, as usual, on the family room couch. She was completely covered by her blankets and was sleeping peacefully, but was happy to see me when I greeted her. I went upstairs to change clothes and returned to her. I sprawled out on the couch, and she curled up with me. I petted her as I cried quietly, wondering how I was going to get through this. At one point, she shifted her body and rested her head on my chest, gazing into my eyes. I told myself I would never forget the coarse feeling of her fur, the shape of her head, and the way she fit her body to the shape of mine. Jim and the kids came in and out of the room, but mostly left me just to be with her.

A short time later, Mom, Dad, and Julie arrived. It was close to the time Jim and I had to leave to get to the Animal Hospital before closing. I wanted to stretch out my time with her as much as possible. When we couldn’t hang around anymore, I got up to get Bijoux’s collar, which she hadn’t worn in a couple of months because she had a fatty tumor on the front of her neck and I hadn’t wanted it to get irritated. As I was retrieving her collar and her leash, my parents and Julie said a brief good-bye. I felt as if I were in a total fog as I walked over towards her. As I kneeled down on the floor next to her, I leaned over to put her collar on, and let out a cry as I fastened it around her neck. I buried my face into her body and just hugged her, and I heard my Mom telling the boys, “It’s okay…”

I stood up and when Bijoux saw the leash, she did jump up, just like Dr. Staudacher predicted she might. My parents told Dylan and Jason that they needed to say goodbye to Bijoux, and they each did so quickly, with a little kiss and hug.

I felt completely wretched as I walked her out to the car. She was so excited to be “going for a walk”, and here I was, taking her to die. I’m not sure that I have ever felt that guilty in my life, although deep down I knew we were doing the right thing.

Jim had set up her blue blanket on the back seat of the car. When I saw it I knew he meant well, but I thought to myself, “He’s got to be kidding!” There was no way I would not hold her on my lap! I grabbed the blanket from the back seat and sat down in the front passenger’s seat, where I held Bijoux for one of the longest fifteen minute drives I’ve ever experienced.

Jim didn’t say much; I’m sure he didn’t know what to say to me. He just kept his hand on mine when he could, and petted Bijoux every now and then. I knew he was hurting too, and I felt bad that I couldn’t comfort him like he was comforting me. He asked me if I was sure that I wanted to go into the exam room with her; he knew it would be very, very difficult to take. I told him that after all of the joy Bijoux gave to me, after all of the unconditional love, I felt that it was absolutely the least I could do to be there for her until the very end. I told him that he didn’t have to go in with us if he didn’t want to, but he told me that he wanted to be there for me.

When we were a couple of minutes away from the vet, Jim called to let them know we were on our way. We walked right up to the counter and I filled out the paperwork, indicating that we didn’t want to take her home with us afterwards. I paid for the procedure, and the receptionist led us into an exam room immediately.
We sat on the floor with Bijoux, stroking her and crying. I still hadn’t quite figured out exactly how I was going to get through this, but I knew that it would all be okay.

In just a few minutes, Dr. Grant entered the room. She greeted us, and asked if we would like a bit more time before she got started. We both answered no, dreading the procedure but wanting it over with all at the same time. Dr. Grant explained what would happen, and I found her manner and her voice to be so completely gentle and soothing. I was so thankful that she spoke slowly, making sure that we understood everything. She asked if we had any questions, and when we didn’t, she left the room briefly to get what she needed.

When she returned, she also brought another woman with her. This woman was a technician who would help hold Bijoux for the procedure. She lifted Bijoux onto the table, stood her up, and held her against her chest. As Dr. Grant prepared her paw for the injection, Jim and I stood at Bijoux’s head, talking to her and petting her.

Dr. Grant gave her the first injection and we waited for something to happen. Bijoux seemed to relax just a bit. Dr. Grant said that she would have to give her another one, and as she made her preparations, I continued talking to Bijoux. She just looked a little woozy to me, and she didn’t take her eyes off of me the entire time.

Dr. Grant gave her the second injection, and within a second or two, Bijoux’s legs completely relaxed and her body sank down onto the table. The technician eased her into a natural position while Dr. Grant pulled out her stethoscope. She checked Bijoux’s heartbeat and said that she was almost gone, but that she would give her a third injection after we left. Jim asked her to do it while we were there, and I am thankful that he thought of that. Dr. Grant said, “Oh, of course.”

She injected Bijoux one last time and this time when she checked, found no heartbeat. She told us that Bijoux was gone. I asked her if Dr. Staudacher was in the building, and she said that he was. I asked her to please tell him that we had been in, and to thank him for me; that his advice really helped me feel better. She smiled and said she would pass on the message.

Jim and I turned to leave, and I kissed Bijoux on the forehead one last time. I picked up her collar and leash, and we left the exam room for the last time. I was grateful that we had taken care of all of the paperwork ahead of time as we walked out into the bright sunshine of the day as quickly as we could go, to get out of there.

We were stunned and quiet on the way home. We kept telling ourselves that we had done the right thing, but everything felt so strange. Everyone was still at the house when we got there, and Mom, Julie and I went out to the store. It was nice to have a diversion.

After they all went home that evening, I started gathering up Bijoux’s things. I put her food and water dishes on the kitchen desk and rolled her leash and collar together, placing them in one of the dishes. I threw away her dog treats. I put her bed aside, as I planned to pass it on to Minnie.

That afternoon, I dropped Friday’s film off at Walgreens for One-Hour developing. When I returned to pick them up, I was pleasantly surprised to find that so many of the photos we took turned out great. My favorite shot was one that Dylan took of Bijoux and me. I am laying behind her with one arm draped over her back and under her front paw. Her face is against mine. She’s looking off to the side, and I am looking at the camera, just barely smiling.

A picture is worth a thousand words, and although I can tell now how obvious her state of health was at the time, looking at this photograph causes so many memories to come flooding back to me. Bijoux was truly one of the blessings of my life.

It seemed as though for several days I couldn’t stop crying. Every little thing made me cry:
• when I dropped food on the floor and she didn’t come running to clean it up for me
• when I returned home and didn’t see her laying on the couch
• when I left home and didn’t see her little head peering out the living room window at me, just waiting for her chance to jump on the good couch
• when I went to bed and she wasn’t in the room
• when I looked through the window into the backyard, knowing that she’d never walk through my flower beds again
• when I went to use the bathroom and didn’t hear her nose try to push the door open
• when I looked at pictures of her—puppy pictures and “old lady” pictures

I needed some sort of plan to deal with my grief, even though I knew that what I was experiencing was normal. I felt horrible much of the time. I had an intense need to turn all of the negatives into positives. A flood of healing was about to take place, and I was the one who could make it happen.

The Most Difficult of Preparations

2008-01-24T08:02:00.002-06:00

Lesson Number Fifteen: If You Love Someone, Set Them Free part two

Jim and I discussed what we would tell Dylan and Jason. We wanted, as always, to be honest with them but we didn’t want to scare them either. Amazingly, although Jason had been with me for most of the experience, he seemed to not have any idea that anything was amiss. We sat them down in the kitchen and spoke to them slowly and deliberately. Jim did most of the talking, which was a relief to me. He told them that when we took Bijoux to be checked, we were told that she is very sick. He said that although she didn’t seem sick to us right now because she was acting very normally for her, her health was gradually going to get worse and then eventually she was going to die.

Dylan asked how long it would be. Jim told him that we didn’t know, that the kind of illness she had didn’t have any kind of clock on it: it could be two weeks, two months, or even a year. The most important thing for us to remember right now, we explained, is that this was truly a piece of good fortune that we can do our best to make her as comfortable as possible, and to enjoy having her around while we still can.

We asked if they had any questions, and they both said no. They got up from the kitchen stools and went right to Bijoux. They spent a few minutes with her and then went on to something else. Looking back, I believe that telling them the information that we did was the best thing to do. In a way, we gave them a little gift: the ability to try and prepare for the inevitable—as much as children can prepare for something they’ve never experienced.

Life went on as normally as possible for the next couple of weeks. We gated Bijoux in the family room for a couple of days, but as she kept jumping up to the couch and on to the floor, I took the gate down. If she seemed fine jumping the distance from the floor to the couch, then the stairs were probably a piece of cake. I reasoned that I wanted her to be able to do whatever (within reason) she wanted to do at this stage of her life. In fact, I used that reasoning quite often over the next two months. Had it been before that dreaded day of discovery, Jim would have complained that I was giving in to her every whim and I needed not to spoil her so much. Now though, he just silently shook his head, letting me do what I needed to do to make her happy, because he knew that it made me happy. I ran out to Petsmart and purchased a puffy, foam-filled bed for Bijoux, which I placed on the other side of the bed, away from the outside wall.

After a while, the Senior dog food I had been feeding Bijoux was being left untouched. I couldn’t stand the thought of her starving, so I began cooking for her. I made combinations of rice, chicken, and scrambled eggs for her twice daily. Sometimes I tossed some cheddar cheese in the mix. To make things more efficient, I cooked enough rice and chicken at one time to last three or four days, and just warmed it slightly when I fed her. Jim thought I was completely nuts, but again didn’t say a word.

At first, Bijoux became very excited about her new diet. I tried to stir some of the canned dog food in with my concoctions, but she picked around it. Eventually I didn’t even attempt it.

As time went on, Bijoux had less and less of an appetite. I begged her to eat. I occasionally tried to feed her out of my hand, but she didn’t want to eat. Eventually she would only eat a little bit of what I made for her every other day, but I still continued to cook. She was losing weight, and I knew it wouldn’t be long.

One day, I “borrowed” Minnie. I thought that a visit might be good for Bijoux’s spirits. I was happy when Bijoux perked up at the sight of her friend. They didn’t play together like they used to, but it was clear to me that Bijoux had a good day. Minnie alternated between playing with us and taking breaks near Bijoux.

Almost two months after her diagnosis, we noticed that Bijoux seemed to be breathing differently. It wasn’t a completely conspicuous change, but every now and then the speed of her breathing would accelerate. Jim and I had several discussions about our plan, constantly reassessing how long we should wait before taking her in. What we wanted most was for her to leave this world without having been in pain: a tough thing for two reasonable and intelligent humans to judge.

I called the Naperville Animal Hospital to get some advice. I spoke with Dr. Staudacher, who was very thoughtful and caring in conversation. He told me that he had seen many pet owners drag things out for their own good, not putting much real consideration into the well-being of their beloved pet. He told me to watch for signs that Bijoux’s quality of life was decreased: little appetite and little physical activity were some of the first signs of things to come. As he spoke with empathy, he told me what we already knew: that it was our decision to make.

I asked him what happened once we made the decision. He told me that we would bring her to the vet and fill out some forms. There were a couple of options: we could have her cremated alone so that we could put her remains in a container, we could bring her body home with us for our own burial, or we could have her cremated in a group of other animals. Dr. Staudacher said that we would pay for the procedure, whichever one we chose, before we went into the exam room so that we could just leave afterwards. She would be given an injection that was really a strong sedative. The strength of the injection (and some animals, he said, needed more than one) quickly shuts down the organs. He told me that it happens in a matter of seconds and that she wouldn’t feel anything.

Dr. Staudacher also told me that I shouldn’t be surprised if Bijoux suddenly perked up for the trip to the vet. He said that was completely normal. I dreaded it.

I expressed concern that we would get there after this long and emotional road, and one of the doctors would say, “She’s not ready yet.” He emphatically denied that this would happen, saying that our decision would be honored, no matter what. I felt so much better, and so much more at peace with everything after I hung up the phone. I shared the information with Jim, and I think he felt a little better, too.

Click here for part 3!

The Beginning of the End

2008-01-23T06:27:00.002-06:00

Lesson Number Fifteen: If You Love Someone, Set Them Free

I spent Bijoux’s last few years dreading her death, when overall she was quite healthy. I didn’t dwell on these feelings of doom for long periods of time; they just popped up out of the blue and then disappeared like rain clouds. I did my best to treat these feelings as a reminder that I needed to enjoy Bijoux as much as possible while I could. That she would eventually, as all living things do, die was always in the back of my head; how I would handle it was a very scary thought. I couldn’t even begin to imagine how painful it would be.

The beginning of the end was in the fall of the year 2002. Bijoux suddenly didn’t seem to have much of an appetite. My sense of dread started to rise, and after a couple of days, I decided to call Dr. Heflin to ask her if she thought I should bring Bijoux in to see her. The receptionist who answered the phone told me that Dr. Heflin had recently retired and moved to the South. I was completely blown away by the news. I was so happy for her, because she seemed to spend most of her waking hours at the hospital, but personally I was devastated. I selfishly imagined that she’d always be there, always available to us, and that her involvement with us would help me deal with Bijoux’s eventual death because I trusted her so completely. I felt like a child with these feelings, and resolved to concentrate on how happy Dr. Heflin probably was, now that she moved on to something else in her life.

I grudgingly left my contact information to be passed on, and another doctor returned my phone call later in the day. The doctor—who was extremely kind, soothing, and helpful, qualities I shouldn’t have been surprised about because he worked in the same environment that Dr. Heflin had—told me that Bijoux’s lack of desire at mealtime could be a dental issue. Older dogs, he said, sometimes had pain in their teeth when chewing on the hard food that I had always given her. He suggested that I switch her gradually over to a soft food for “Senior” dogs, so off to Petsmart we went!

After switching Bijoux’s food, she seemed to work up excitement for meals again. For the next couple of months, she ate her food almost every time I put it down for her. I chalked the problem up to the sensitivity in her teeth, as the doctor suggested. I felt good about things again. Jim and I, however, also began to notice that Bijoux’s activity level had decreased a great deal. She slept for many hours during the day, and was ready to go to bed earlier than ever. My tendency to retreat into denial was the norm when it came to the prospect of Bijoux’s deteriorating health.

Sometime during this period, we purchased a new, king-sized bed. Upon its delivery, we discovered that the top of the mattress was approximately six to eight inches higher than the old waterbed we discarded. It would be impossible for her to jump up onto the bed herself, and it was too risky, we decided, to assist her in getting up. Recently she had started to get up in the middle of the night, needing to go out. We were concerned that she would jump off of the bed and break a leg. We made the tough decision to make Bijoux a little bed of blankets on the floor.

One Saturday in February of 2003, Jim and Dylan were at a Scout activity of some sort. Jason was with me, at work. I planned to leave work early and take Jason to Julie’s apartment for a quick visit, and then possibly see a movie with him. It would be a long day for Bijoux to be home alone, but I figured that we could get into an early show and get home for her, and she’d be fine.

One of the girls who worked in the childcare area called my extension to tell me that Jason had a headache and felt somewhat warm. Our afternoon plans were thwarted, but in the end I was glad. I called Julie to tell her that we wouldn’t be visiting her after all, and we left to go home. On the way home we went through the McDonalds drive-thru.

We entered the house and I called to Bijoux. The house was eerily quiet, but I knew Bijoux would appear before us momentarily, when she smelled the food. She had taken to occasionally sleeping upstairs in the bedroom, in her nest of blankets. Jason and I set up our lunch in the family room so we could eat while watching television. As we began to eat, I became worried. We had been home, McDonalds in hand, for about three minutes and Bijoux was nowhere to be found. I whistled for her, and when she didn’t respond I ran up the stairs, growing more afraid by the second.

I rounded the corner into our bedroom and went to the far side of the bed where she was laying on her blankets. She looked like she had just woken up from a long nap, but seemed happy to see me. I petted her and said, “Come on! French fries!”

Assuming she would get up and follow me, I bounded back down the stairs. I listened carefully, trying to hear the click-click-click of her nails on the hardwood floor. Nothing. Finally I heard her walking, and I sat back down on the couch. She slowly made her way down to the kitchen, and sat down at the top of the stairs to the family room. At that time I had no idea what a hard time she had, getting down those first seven steps to the main level of the house.

I started to become truly alarmed when she wouldn’t proceed down the final seven steps to the family room to claim the French fry I held out for her. I called her name, trying to coax her down. She finally came down the stairs and lay down on the carpet in the middle of the room. I couldn’t get her to get up, not even for that stupid French fry. In one of my biggest ever shows of problem avoidance, I called the Animal Hospital for some advice. My panic, mixed with denial, temporarily paralyzed my judgment and I needed someone to tell me that I should get her there as soon as possible. I actually asked the receptionist, “Do you think I should get her in there today?” Naturally she suggested that an office visit would be the most prudent thing at this point.

I called Julie, praying that I would be able to get in touch with her, and asked her to meet me at the vet, so that Jason would be taken care of. I told Jason to get in the car with his lunch as I wrapped Bijoux in a blanket and carried her, because she wouldn’t walk, out to the garage. After settling her in the passenger seat, we took off for the vet.

That Saturday was one of the busiest days I had ever seen at the vet. There were people and animals everywhere in the lobby, sitting on every bench and standing in every corner of the room. The line at the reception desk had two or three people in it, waiting to be helped. I carried my 40-something-pound dog in and got in line. I tried not to be impatient while everyone behind the desk seemed to be moving in slow motion. Bijoux was getting heavy, but I couldn’t put her down.

Julie arrived shortly, and as I finally got to the front of the line and got Bijoux’s name on the waiting list, she took Jason to a vacant bench. I joined them, cuddling Bijoux on my lap. Julie spoke to her and petted her, kissing her on the forehead. I felt as if I would explode as my anxiety reached peak after peak, and still we had to wait. The minutes seemed like hours. I alternated between tearing up and pulling it together. Julie kept trying to reassure me that everything was going to be okay, and I kept trying to believe her. She will never know how much I appreciate her presence and strength that day.

Since the wait seemed endless, Julie took Jason to Portillo’s (a hot dog place). Left alone with Bijoux, I cuddled her and looked around at the other people who were waiting. It seemed to me that most of them had brought brand-new little puppies to get their booster shots. In my panic, I felt extremely paranoid, like all of the puppy owners were staring at me with my old, precious dog. I felt hostile, and would have given anything to be allowed into a patient room ahead of all of those puppy owners. I missed Dr. Heflin terribly.

Finally, Bijoux’s name was called. I carefully picked her up and took her into the designated patient room. I put her, blankets and all, on the exam table. A young doctor entered the room shortly after we did. I didn’t remember ever noticing him during our previous visits. He was very pleasant and wrote down everything I told him about Bijoux’s behavior.

His first concern was for Bijoux’s back. The fact that she had so much trouble walking—and then refused to walk at all—made him worry that she pinched a nerve or slipped a disc. He said that his preferred course of action was to take x-rays and a shot of an anti-inflammatory drug. I gave him permission, and he carried Bijoux out of the room to go ahead with the procedures. While they were gone, I struggled with what we would do if she had a major back injury.

The last surgery she had, after her knee surgery, was to remove some fatty tumors that Dr. Heflin said were quite normal in older dogs. In the time after those first fatty tumors were removed, many more grew, including one on her hip that became almost as big as a golf ball. Dr. Heflin recommended that at her advanced age, Bijoux shouldn’t go through that surgery again unless it seemed to us that the tumors were causing her pain. Jim and I had discussed this kind of thing at length, and we agreed that she was getting too old to go through surgery after surgery anyway. At some point we would have to let her go.

After about twenty minutes, the doctor returned. He walked in hesitantly and didn’t make eye contact right away. I could tell that there was something wrong. He had the x-rays with him and said, “I want to show you Bijoux’s films.” As he put the films on the wall viewer, he said, “I took a couple of pictures from different angles and I found nothing wrong with her back.” I said, “That’s great, right? But what’s wrong?” He flicked the light on so we could look at the x-rays and said, “I found something else.” I looked at the film and my heart sank into my stomach. Bijoux’s lungs, as the doctor pointed out, were about 1/3 full of little circles, tumors of some kind.

I started to cry again. “What are we supposed to do now???” I asked him. I was living one of my biggest nightmares. He said that if we wanted to, they could do some exploratory surgery, but considering the fact that she had just turned thirteen, the surgery and her recovery could have complications and it was important for us to weigh everything when making our decision. I told him that Jim and I had already discussed what we would do in a situation like this, and that wouldn’t be an option anyway. I asked him what we could do for her, for the time being.

He told me that even though he didn’t see anything wrong with her back on the x-ray, he gave her the anti-inflammatory injection anyway. He suggested that we keep her on one floor of the house from now on: no more stairs. He looked me in the eyes and told me that it was time to just make her as comfortable as possible. Try to keep her eating and drinking, and give her lots of love, he said. He told me that eventually she would probably begin to have breathing trouble, and to watch out for that. I thanked him and headed out to the lobby, where Julie and Jason were waiting for me. I told Julie what had happened, and at that moment her cell phone rang. It was Jim, on his way home from Scouts. I filled him in and told him I’d see him at home soon. I went to the reception desk to pay for the visit, and waited for Bijoux to be brought out to me.

I had quite a shock when I heard the door to the back room open. I turned around, and Bijoux came bounding out, using her own four legs to come to me. She wagged her tail and when I kneeled down she licked me and nudged me, ready to go home. This was completely beyond my realm of comprehension, how I brought her to the vet completely unable to walk, and now, two hours later, was walking her to the car on the other end of her leash.

On the way home, Bijoux settled herself in the blanket on the passenger’s seat just as she always did, and napped on the way home. When I parked the car in the garage and opened her door, she hopped down and trotted inside the house. For me, this was all way too much for one day. As I sat in the family room petting her, I tried to digest everything and attempted to come up with some kind of explanation for what had happened; why she had to be carried into the vet but jogged out to the car.

The only plausible conclusion I reached was that her little nest of blankets that was on the floor next to our bed was on the outside wall of the house. It was the middle of a cold winter, and perhaps sleeping for who-knows-how-long next to that wall made her very stiff. By the time we were finished at the vet, she would have warmed up and had little to no trouble moving.

Another wrench in the day was discovered when I went upstairs towards the bedroom: Bijoux had vomited on the Pottery Barn rug in the living room. I assumed that she had been sleeping on the living room couch while I was working, and—God love her—she hopped down when she felt sick. It must have been after that when she retired to the bedroom.

I kept running the day through my head over and over again, and decided that the only thing I knew for sure, without a doubt, was that the chain of events that led to the discovery of the tumors in her lungs was meant to happen for a reason. Had Jason not felt warm, had we not purchased McDonald’s French fries, had we not come home early to find that Bijoux couldn’t walk, had she not (probably) been too stiff to walk…we never would have taken her to be checked and we wouldn’t have found out at that time that she was ill. Although the news had been very upsetting to us, we chose to take it all in as a blessing. Our time with Bijoux was now very limited, but we felt lucky that we had a bit of a warning.

Click here for part 2!

Sadness Warning

2008-01-22T18:41:00.000-06:00

I wanted to let my blog readers know that the next "Lesson" from my essay collection is the sad one. It is also very long (15 pages in Microsoft Word!) and covers a few months' time. When I wrote it, I just "spewed" the experience and didn't want to divide it up to make it shorter. Now that I am posting the essays online,I know that posting 15 pages in one day is a bit ridiculous so I will tell you that although I will divide it, I will make sure to post the next parts each day after the one before so it's not like I'm trying to cause some kind of cliffhanger.

I have had mixed feelings about getting to this point in my posting of the essays. While it makes me terribly sad to relive it on paper, I want to share it with everyone too because I think it's yet another part of the grieving process, though a small one.

So, that's what I'll do: the first part of Lesson 15 goes up tomorrow morning.

xoxo!

Vets are the Best!

2008-01-22T14:29:00.001-06:00

Lesson Number Fourteen: Always Get The Best Care For Those You Love

We had been gradually treated to clues of Bijoux’s neuroticism early on in her puppyhood. In fact, these little episodes—such as jumping the baby gate, pooping in front of the box fan, only eating certain flavors of Milk Bones—were merely a warm-up from the Big Daddy of all neuroses. And it only cost us $775 in veterinary bills (almost two months rent at the time) to make the discovery.

In December of 1990, Jim, on the U.S.S. Theodore Roosevelt, left on a six-month cruise, heading towards the trouble zone in the Middle East. It was quite a stressful time, as the threat of war loomed on the horizon, and Jim was supposed to be released from the ship to shore duty in Great Lakes Illinois in May of 1991. Shortly after he departed, I began my final semester at Old Dominion University, a semester in which I would be consumed with the duties of full-time student teaching, along with keeping my evening job at Leewards Craft Store.

So that's how it went: he was in the Middle East, and I was teaching and working almost every waking moment. Bijoux became very sick. She was vomiting constantly, and having diarrhea constantly. She didn't want to eat, and she was getting skinnier and skinnier. I had her in and out of the vet's office several times: they even kept her there for a 3-day period and then, less than a week later, a 4-day period. Blood work was done, and the University of Virginia (where Dr. Fisher sent it) couldn't find a darn thing wrong with her.

Dr. Fisher had a theory: She was lonely. Wha??? It made sense on a logical level I supposed, but could a dog really get that sick from a period of loneliness? The proof that Dr. Fisher—bless his soul—was right came to us in the second week of May. Within that one whirlwind week, Jim flew home from the Persian Gulf, I completed my student teaching assignment, quit my job at Leewards, and graduated from Old Dominion University. Within days, we moved north so Jim could begin his shore duty assignment at Great Lakes. Like magic, Bijoux was completely “healed”. She became the normally digesting, playful puppy we had grown to know and love.

Another veterinarian made an indelible mark on our family, starting when we moved to Illinois. A neighbor referred me to the Animal Hospital that was less than two miles from the house. It was a group of doctors much like a family practice; each time we took Bijoux in for a visit, we never knew which doctor would come through the door. Since her illness as a puppy, Bijoux was always frightened on a visit to the vet. Upon arrival, she trembled and shed hair in bunches. She often hopped up to sit on my lap in the lobby (or even on the bench next to me, like a real person!), and when we were shown to a patient room, she would either hide under my legs if I sat on the bench, or she would press her shaking body against mine if I joined her on the floor. She absolutely hated being placed on the exam table and constantly sought a way to try to jump past us to the floor. The doctors were all great with her, but one day we found our favorite.

Dr. Dena Heflin entered the patient room, where Bijoux and I sat on the floor waiting. She greeted us, smiling, and as I shook her hand I explained Bijoux’s nervousness. Dr. Heflin said, “Oh, that’s okay! I’ll just check her out here on the floor!” With that, she plopped down onto the floor next to us, and spent a couple of minutes just talking sweetly to Bijoux and petting her, trying to make her feel as comfortable as possible. Bijoux responded by gradually wagging her tail and eventually licking the doctor’s face. I was amazed, and speechless. Dr. Heflin then examined her slowly and carefully, speaking to her as she worked.

Her kindness and consideration for this animal so impressed me that I requested Dr. Heflin each time Bijoux needed shots or had some medical problem that needed to be checked out. I always called the vet to make sure she was working on the day I wanted to bring Bijoux in, and if she was not scheduled to work that day or had surgeries to perform, I changed my schedule to make sure that we could meet with her.

For nearly the last seven years of her life, Bijoux was examined on the floor by Dr. Heflin. Dr. Heflin diagnosed Bijoux’s allergies, performed her knee surgery, removed a “fatty tumor” from her hip, and kept a close eye on other “fatty tumors” that popped up as Bijoux advanced in age. We breathed a big sigh of relief together when a battery of tests showed that Bijoux’s sudden (over a four month period) eight-pound weight loss turned out to be the result of a regular exercise “routine”: playing with her new friend Minnie. Dr. Heflin easily made herself available to speak to me by phone when I just had a quick question, and she always knew exactly how to reassure me when there were problems. Her cheerful greeting of "Hey Bij!" is a sound byte that is still in my head to this day.

As Bijoux got older, I began dreading her eventual death. I wasn’t obsessed hour-by-hour with the idea, however I thought about it now and then and although I was a mature adult who knew the life cycle, I became upset at the mere thought of losing her. One of the thoughts that I was able to comfort myself with was that at least when something happened to Bijoux, she would be in great hands with Dr. Heflin.

Got a Call From England Today...

2008-01-21T13:34:00.000-06:00

I just got off the phone with Julie Hill of Dogcast Radio, an internet radio show and Podcast for dog lovers!

Julie contacted me last week to ask for an interview about the book and I was thrilled to make the appointment for today's call. I was sort of nervous about the interview, but was put at ease immediately by Julie's demeanor (and the knowledge that she will edit the interview before broadcast! LOL). She is such a pleasant woman; we probably could have talked all day long if we didn't have anything else to do!

We talked for a few minutes, off topic about the weather and such, to warmup before the actual interview and then away we went. I feel pretty certain that I didn't say anything completely stupid, although I did use the wrong tense on a verb once but promptly corrected myself. After about 25 minutes, she thanked me for the interview, signalling that part was over, and we spoke for a few more minutes before hanging up. All in all, it was a great experience.

The interview should be up (at the Dogcast radio AND on iTunes!) in late March or early April...of course I'll keep you posted!

One For You...a Whole Bag For Me!

2008-01-21T12:39:00.001-06:00

Lesson Number Thirteen: You Are What You Eat

Bijoux, like most beagles I’ve ever met or even read about in books, was a connoisseur of people food. She’d do anything to get it. Of course I knew, from my experience with dogs and from reviewing the rules by reading Superpuppy, that giving people food to our dog was a big no-no, but every now and then we felt extra benevolent. Unfortunately, once a dog gets her mouth around a couple of items from the people’s food category, it’s hard to discontinue the practice of treating her. That’s why she was great at suckering me into sharing my toast, popcorn, rice, Popsicles, cheese, and all of those other favorites of hers.

Then there’s the fact that when it comes to people food, dogs generally don’t have the desire, discipline, or self-control to back off when temptation smacks them right in the face. That’s why Bijoux temporarily turned herself into the equivalent of a doublewide trailer by eating that entire loaf of wheat bread at one standing. Unfortunately, that day was no big deal compared to one particular day in 2001, in the middle of October.

Upon returning home from work, Bijoux greeted me in her normal way as I walked into the house. I took a couple minutes to pet her and talk to her, and then I put my purse down in the family room. I walked up the seven steps to the kitchen so I could check the answering machine, and noticed a plastic bag on the floor. Not thinking much about it at that moment, I picked it up before I realized what it was. I was shocked to discover that Bijoux had downed an entire 12-ounce bag of Hershey Miniature candy bars that were intended for Halloween use. They were 100% chocolate, with some crunch or some nuts thrown in. I was slightly surprised that there was not a wrapper in sight; I didn’t expect that Bijoux would have been able to actually unwrap her treasure, but I also didn’t expect that there would be no paper trail left anywhere either.

Knowing that chocolate can be toxic to dogs if ingested in large amounts, I tried to keep calm as I called the Animal Hospital. I told the receptionist that she was acting completely normal for the time being, but was worried. She put me on hold in order to ask one of the doctors about my best plan of action. When she returned to the phone, she gave me two options. She said that Bijoux needed to get as much of the chocolate out of her system as possible, and I could either write down what I needed to do to induce vomiting at home, or I could bring her in. I wisely chose the latter.

The doctor who saw us that day asked me how much chocolate she ate, and I told him about the bag. He said that I did the right thing by bringing her in, although a dog of her size would had to have ingested much more chocolate to die from it…so I felt reassured. I left Bijoux with the great people at the animal hospital overnight and brought her home 24 hours later, good as new. It was a loud-and-clear wake-up call, and we all tried to be more careful with putting food away in the cabinets after that.

Audio-Visual Memories

2008-01-21T07:12:00.000-06:00

For the last two days, we've been watching old videos of the kids (I'm actually trying to find a specific clip, and I can't remember the date it's from, so we're just watching the whole videotape!). I forgot, until I put in the first tape, how prominently Bijoux/the real Ruby appears in all of our home video, back in the day.

While the reminders of how big she was (twice as large as our beagle Roxie), how sweet she was, and how good with the kids she was are bittersweet, it is heartwarming to see her (and hear her!) "in action" again. I have spent the last year only focusing on the photos (for the book), and totally forgot that I have plenty of memories to revisit on video.

Mi Casa Es Su Casa

2008-01-15T06:40:00.001-06:00

Lesson Number Twelve: What’s Hers Is Hers, and What’s Mine Is Hers

In the fall of 2000 after years of renting, we finally purchased a home. Our new home had both a family room and a living room. We were very excited about the idea of having some new furniture; our living room couch and loveseat were purchased in 1991 when we moved to Kenosha. Our family room sofa bed was in decent condition but was extremely uncomfortable. We made the decision to discard the sofa bed and use the couch and loveseat in our new family room, which was on the lower level. We would purchase new furniture for the living room, which was the room that all visitors to our house would see. After we ordered a cream-colored couch, the concern that Jim and I shared was that Bijoux wouldn’t stay off the new furniture. (Remember, the Couch Incident?)

We became determined to work extra hard to teach this old(er) dog a new trick. After our new furniture was delivered, we were extremely diligent in keeping Bijoux on the floor. In fact, she adopted my eight-foot by ten-foot Oriental Poppy wool rug from Pottery Barn as her very own, and eventually parked herself there whenever we were in the living room or the adjacent dining room.

Time after time Bijoux tried to hop up and settle herself on the new couch with us, and time after time we would scold her. After a couple of weeks, she was able to remember that the new couch was “ours”, yet she was still allowed on “her” couch and loveseat in the family room. Or so I thought... actually, she yet again proved that she was smarter than we gave her credit for!

One morning I left the house as usual. I backed the car out of the garage and into the street. Suddenly, I realized that I forgot something. I drove back up the driveway and ran into the house. The forgotten item was in the kitchen and as I ran up the stairs, I noticed a familiar black, brown, and white furry ball curled up on “our” couch. Bijoux’s head shot up with a start when she realized that I was back in the house, and as she saw me (and heard me scolding her), she slunk, ears pulled back as far as they could go, off the couch and onto the rug.

When I returned to my car, I started the ignition again and began to back out into the street. I looked at our picture window and noticed Bijoux sitting on our couch, watching me drive away. Amazingly, as I glared at her from the driver’s seat and pointed my finger downward…and she got down. (It was highly unlikely, I’ll concede, that she saw the way I glared at her, however, I’m pretty certain she sensed the anger in the way I was gesturing to her!) I drove away, laughing.

After that episode, I watched the picture window carefully when I left the driveway. Sometimes I could see Bijoux’s cute little face near the bottom of the window as she watched me, and sometimes I saw her mostly-white body creep carefully up onto our couch, as if she thought that the slower she climbed up, the less chance there would be that she’d be noticed. Upon my return home, she was always smart enough to listen for the garage door. Once she heard that, she took off running towards the door in order to greet us as we came in.

Even today I giggle to myself when I think of her sneakiness, her knowing that at least while we were present, she wasn’t allowed on our couch—only on hers.

A Gorgeous Review!

2008-01-10T16:51:00.000-06:00

Melissa at Hope for the Hopeless just posted a GORGEOUS review of the book that details how she shared the book with her daughter this week. They lost their dear cat, Lucky, in November and her daughter was having a hard time with it. I was going to hyperlink it, but for some reason it's not working, so I just copied and pasted! Here it is:

"Thursday, January 10, 2008

If You Have a Child and a Pet, You Must Have This Book...

How do we grieve the loss of a family member? When the family member we lose is of the human variety we have a wake or a funeral and get together and remember our loved one. When the family member we lose is of the pet variety we all seem to be a little stumped.

When Melisa Wells lost her beloved dog, Bijoux she turned her pain into a wonderful children's book. After looking for a book to help her and her family through their time of loss and not finding one that quite fit the bill, she decided to write her own. This week I got a chance to read it.

Most of you know that in November we lost our cat, Lucky. She was with us for 13 years and trying to figure out how to handle the situation with a 5 year old has really been a stumbling block for us.

Earlier this week I received, Remembering Ruby: For Families Living Beyond the Loss of a Pet. I opened this book with trepidation knowing that tears were on the horizon. I was correct, not because the book was sad, but because I could really relate with the story the book was telling. The book is beautiful inside and out. The colorful outside had me surprised when I found black and white pictures inside, it was helpful to see another family that had loved their pet and had lived through the loss.

This book is written for children from 4-10, I was able to finish it in a matter of minutes. I knew this was a book that Hope was going to be able to handle. Since Lucky died we've been having problems figuring out just how to explain the situation to Hope. She has been walking around saying to people. "Hi, my cat died" since November. We knew that she didn't quite know how to process this information but we weren't sure quite what to do. I waited until we had an hour to sit down and read this book and really concentrate on what the book was about.

She loved it, she also cried like a baby for about an hour and I let her because I really believe she got it this time. This was a family that she could look at and compare, they had gone through the same things we have. I can't tell you how many times we went through the book and pointed out pictures. Lucky used to do the same thing as Ruby did, look at Ruby catching the snow ball, this book says it's okay to cry and cry we did.

You know she hasn't said, "Hi, my cat died" since we've read this book. I think we've finally managed to make her understand what happened and I will never be able to thank Melisa Wells enough for helping me help my daughter.

There is also a very helpful "Parent Information" chapter at the back of the book that gives a few ideas on how to tackle this topic with your children.

Seriously, if you have a pet and a child, you need to have this book. We never want to think of our pet dying but when they do we need to make sure we have a way to explain it to our children. If you would like to purchase Remembering Ruby: For Families Living Beyond the Loss of a Pet you can click on the widget on the right side of this page or you can purchase it from Barnes & Noble.

Get it, trust me you will never be sorry, this is a beautiful little book written about a wonderful little doggy who touched a families life and changed them forever.

posted by Melissa at 12:39 PM"

Thanks Melissa for all the kind words! xoxo

Putting the "NO!" in Snow

2008-01-09T11:04:00.001-06:00

Lesson Number Eleven: There’s No Business Like Snow Business

Bijoux was two years old by the time she experienced her first snowfall. She was not frightened or confused; rather, she was just curious. We exploited her tennis ball-catching talent and helped her develop it into a flair for snowball-catching. We had a great time outside during the winter. Bijoux made the drudgery of shoveling seem to fly by, because we spent part of the time tossing snowballs in her direction. She got very excited when one of us started to pack snow into a little ball, and she ran right over to catch it. Oftentimes, the snow was too powdery and dry to pack, but she still tried to catch the handfuls of loose particles as if it were the most fun activity she’d ever taken part in. The pattern of her play involved trying to catch the snow that was thrown to her, and then running a lap or two (or three) all the way around the house as fast as she could go, barely dodging us as she passed us each time.

Her love for the snow was also, unfortunately, the cause of much drama later on in her life (what else would you expect from a Princess?). The northern winters were often harsh, with temperatures falling below zero and wind chills in the negative 20’s and 30’s. On occasion, she would refuse to go outside to urinate unless we physically pushed her out the door. Other times, she would willingly go out, following an odiferous trail all the way to the back of the yard. (These times, by the way, almost always happened when Jim and I were only in a robe, with bare feet) As she sniffed her way around outside, the cold eventually attacked her feet and she would stop dead in her tracks, looking at us looking at her through the door. She picked one paw up out of the snow, held it up for a moment, and then put it back down, only to lift another one up. Her feet were freezing and she wasn’t able to (or didn’t feel like?) get herself back to the door. Jim or I had to rush around to get completely dressed to go outside in the yard and rescue our big baby before frostbite set in (Did I mention that she had to be carried?).

One year I got smart. I went to the pet store to check on the cost of boots for dogs. They were outrageously priced, and I stood in front of the display for a minute or two, mentally sifting through my options. In a flash of brilliance, I hurried out to my car and drove to Target, where I purchased several pairs of baby socks. Waterproof? No. However, we didn’t have a sleddin’ dog and for the amount of time that she was actually outside, I determined that if I put two socks on each paw, she’d be fine.

I’m still not sure if the $40 I saved was worth it; the ordeal we had to go through each time she wanted to go outside was sort of tedious. We ended up having to loosely place my hair rubberbands around the socks to keep them on her feet. She was a new dog though, trekking around outside like it was spring. Her “Shnoh Shnocks”, as we called them, saved us many trips outside for several years after that discovery.

In January of 1998, Bijoux’s excitement for the winter had catastrophic consequences. I had been shoveling snow while the kids played close by, and Bijoux was begging for snowballs, as usual. The snow was easy to pack that afternoon; the morning temperature had been slightly warmer than normal, but cooled down again as the day went on, producing a thin layer of ice on top of the snow in the yard. As I tossed snowballs for her, she took off on some laps around the house each time, just like always. Suddenly she appeared from the side yard, but she was limping. Figuring that her paws were just too cold, I took her inside the house and sat down on the floor with her. I checked between the pads on her paws for ice and found none. It seemed like she was holding one of her back legs in a strange way, so I closed my hand over her back paw to warm it up. I then went to the kitchen and filled a small bowl with warm water. I brought it back to her and dipped her paw in it. She made no sound but the look on her face told me that she was having some discomfort.

Jim arrived home and, after I apprised him of the situation, offered to take her to the vet for a quick check. When he returned over an hour later without her, I started to get upset. The vet discovered that in running around like she had been, she tore her meniscus. Jim was told that if we didn’t put her through knee surgery immediately, not only would she would never walk correctly again, but she could also have chronic pain in that leg.

As we told friends and family what had happened, we joked about the expense of the surgery and how we just couldn’t believe that we were putting our dog through this, but in actuality we wouldn’t have had it any other way. Needless to say, Bijoux’s days of doing laps around the house in the snow were over. She would try to run around many times after she had long recovered from her surgery, but the thought of her injuring herself again made me squeamish, and I made her stop.

Vote For Me!

2008-01-09T06:23:00.000-06:00

Taj over at Taj Wanders was kind enough to nominate this blog for Best Animal Blogger! Do me a favor and vote by clicking this button...please! Thanks, Taj!

The Name's A Game

2008-01-07T14:07:00.001-06:00

Lesson Number Ten: It's All in the Name

Nicknames are normally created either to shorten a given name or with some sort of intent to identify something unique about the recipient. Bijoux had many nicknames over the years. Some were coherent and could be spelled out easily, had there been a need to write them down (like now); others were just a bunch of nonsense. The common thread that tied most of them together was that, for some reason, they came from me.

During the puppy years, I began that most annoying (especially to Jim, and probably to most other clear-thinking, “normal” adults) habit of speaking to her in baby talk. I didn’t do it all the time; rather, I usually used it when I praised her or petted her. From this baby talk came the first coherent nicknames: “My Girl” and “My Little Baby” were most commonly used at first. Only my closest friends and family could watch (and listen to) the spectacle without questioning my sanity.

Our friends’ son, Nicholas, was just a toddler when he referred to Bijoux as “Boo-doo”, and later, Dylan called her “Bee-doo”. Jim’s Mom used to call her “Kirby”, after the brand of vacuum cleaners, because of her talent and desire for cleaning up the crumbs. It wasn’t until Bijoux’s death that we realized how “crumby” our floor could get!

As time went on, I would snuggle up to Bijoux and babble incessantly about my “Pooky”, a name that stemmed from the teddy bear belonging to the cartoon strip cat “Garfield”.

Eventually “Pooky” evolved into “Boo-shee Boo-shee”. Occasionally I threw in the more normally constructed and natural-sounding shortened version of her name, “Bij”, and then that was shortened even more to “B”. Sometimes “B” turned into “Busy Bee”, coming from the favorite toy of the Weimeraner in the movie “Best in Show”.

The earliest occurrence of the nickname that stuck with her the longest and was used by the most people turned up in a conversation (one-sided, of course) that I was having with Bijoux one day. I was calling her my “Boo-shee Boo-shee”, and then turned that into “Shoo-shee”. I thought of the spelling of her name in relation to “Siouxsie and the Banshees”, a popular 1980’s band. I called Bijoux “Siouxsie” (pronounced Susie) and for some reason, I couldn’t let it go. Julie used to warn me, “She’s going to answer to that one day if you keep using it.”

Lo and behold, one day she did! “Siouxsie” became “Susie”, and after a while I used it interchangeably with her given name.

Who's the Baby Now?

2008-01-05T16:23:00.001-06:00

Lesson Number 9: Always Keep Them Guessing, or...Never Let Them See You Sweat

In the fall of 1991, we happily discovered that we would be adding a baby to our family. Our bundle of joy was due to arrive in June of 1992, and as it was my habit to plan ahead, I researched the best ways to prepare our “first baby” for the new baby. I had heard from several friends that the cherished family pet quickly becomes “just an animal” when the baby comes around, and I didn’t want that to happen. I envisioned a home where the baby is taught to socialize properly with the dog, and they would grow up together, happily frolicking in the fenced-in yard together. Frolicking, however, was years off. First I had to do a couple of things to acclimate Bijoux to a House With Baby. We had spent lots of time with Rex and “his baby”, Nicholas. That time was very valuable in Bijoux’s life experiences to that point. She was always gentle with Nick, and if he pulled her tail or tried to roughhouse with her, she would glance at us as if to say, “Yes, I’m being patient.” She truly loved Nick, and I hoped that she would react the same way when a baby actually spent 24 hours each day on “her” turf.

In the later months of my pregnancy, I let Bijoux spend time in the baby’s room as Jim and I set it up. Once I even—against all of the leading baby experts’ advice—let her lay down in the crib, snuggled up in the blankets and leaning against an unopened package of Pampers. I even sprinkled baby powder on blankets and let her smell them. I wasn’t really sure how much more to do, because I really wanted to live this dream of an integrated household.

When I went into labor with Dylan, my parents and sister came to pick Bijoux up and took her home for a couple of days. Even with all of the activity going on with Dylan’s birth, I thought about Bijoux and wondered how she would react when she “met” him.

After the three of us had been home for a couple of days, we were ready to introduce Bijoux and Dylan. It was a tense morning for Jim and me, as we tried to anticipate how the meeting would go. When Julie arrived with Bijoux, I was sitting on the floor in Dylan’s room, holding him. Jim and Julie called for Bijoux, and she trotted into the room. I spoke to her in a quiet, calm tone, “introducing” her to the baby. After all of the worry we went through, she gave his little face a quick sniff and promptly turned around to walk away. We human adults just looked at each other in amazement and disbelief as Bijoux proceeded to ignore us all, making herself comfortable on the couch.

High School Hometown Ink, The Sequel!

2008-01-02T19:25:00.000-06:00

Yippee! I have asked my parents to pick up a copy of this week's Farragut Press, but I found the article online. Enjoy!

FHS grad authors book
Kim Johnson - Thu, Jan, 3, 2008

Are you struggling with helping your child deal with the loss of a four-legged member of your family? If so, Melisa Wells, a Farragut High School graduate who now resides in Illinois but still has strong ties to the Farragut community, has written a book entitled “Remembering Ruby: for families living beyond the loss of a pet,” that may be able to help.

Wells wrote the book after the death of her family pet, a beagle named Bijoux, who succumbed to cancer at the age of 13.

“I searched high and low for a children’s book that I could share with our sons, then 10 and 8 years old, during our ordeal. None of the books I found ‘spoke to me’ and I decided to tell our own story,” Wells said.

“Remembering Ruby” is the result of an entire family’s labor of love and a fitting memorial to the dog that became one of us,” she added.

Wells said she changed the name of the dog in the book to Ruby because Bijoux would have been too hard for some smaller children to pronounce. Since the word bijoux is French for “little jewels” she felt Ruby was a fitting substitution.

Wells, who holds a Bachelors degree in Elementary Education from Old Dominion University in Virginia, said, “I call this a family book because there are two parts to it.

“The first part, a children’s story, is told from my oldest son’s point of view. It is about the relationship he developed with the dog. Then the dog was diagnosed with an illness and it goes through how we were able to help her enjoy her life and how we coped with her illness.

“The second part is a short advice guide for parents and, because all children grieve in different ways, it offers ideas on how, as a family, [they] can help everyone get through it,” she said.

“I primarily [wrote the book] for my family, but, of course, the secondary goal would be to help others,” she added.

Wells said she did most of the research herself, but solicited input on the parents’ guide from her own veterinarian, Dena Heflin, who is a member of the Illinois State Veterinarian Association.

“People who have read it have been extremely positive. One of the things that makes this book so different is that I used family photographs. People have told me it makes the story more real and they relate to it better,” she said.

“Remembering Ruby” is the first book Wells, who is a freelance magazine writer, has written; but the publication process took only about one year.

“The actual writing did not take that long. It took less than a month because it had all happened to us. All I had to do was write it down and make sure it was appropriate for the age group that I was targeting, which is 4 to 10 year-olds and their parents.

“I had both of my sons read it and edit it for me. I remember two things I wrote that my oldest son said, ‘Mom I would never have said that,’ so I changed the wording,” she said.

“The process of working with the publisher took about eight months, so it took about a year from start to finish,” she added.

“Remembering Ruby” was published by Outskirts Press in Parker, Colo., in September 2007. The book can be ordered from amazon.com, barnesandnoble.com or directly from the author. For further information, contact Melisa Wells at rememberingruby@sbcglobal.net.

Try and Try Again...Until It's Time To Give Up

2008-01-01T07:47:00.001-06:00

Lesson Number Eight: Persistence Is The Key…But Some Things Just Aren’t Meant To Be

Early Education experts say that children learn through repetition. Animal experts agree with this statement as it relates to young animals. “Practice, practice, practice” is the mantra of anyone trying to learn something. I am convinced that the reason Bijoux was so smart is because in her earliest years with us, Jim and I spent hours training her. There were teachable moments (house-breaking, “sit”, “stay”, etc.) and near-impossible-to-teach moments (“roll over”).

She had achieved great success with “Sit”, “Lay down”, “Go outside?” and, most importantly, “No!” She understood when I said, “Want a treat?”, “Hungry?”, or “Want some food?” She certainly knew her name. (In later years, she even responded to “Susie”, but that’s in another essay.) She even looked up at the ceiling when I said “Up!” and responded by looking around if I said “Where’s Dylan?” If I said, “Who’s that??” she ran to the door or window. If I said, “Daddy’s home!” she would bark like crazy and anxiously wait for Jim to walk in the door of the house. The fact that I could say “Roll Over!” and nothing happened was definitely not a communication problem, then. When she was a puppy and I was spending hours teaching her the various tricks that she carried with her throughout her life, I did my best to teach her to roll over. I gently pushed her down, paws straight out in front of her. As I said, “Roll over”, I put both of my hands on her back and rolled her over, her legs wildly searching for the ground again. After many days and many attempts, I decided that teaching her to roll over just wasn’t going to happen.

Running was another activity in which Bijoux, for the most part, refused to participate. Jim used running to keep himself in shape for the Navy, and was looking forward to having a partner to keep him company. The very first day he took her out, she got very excited at the sight of the leash. He attached it to her collar and walked her outside. When he came back minutes later, he told me that at the corner of our street when he prepared to “take off”, she sat down and planted her feet firmly into the sidewalk, refusing to move. After repeatedly tugging on her leash and her absolute refusal to accompany him, he pulled her home and, highly agitated, gave up. As a dog set free in a yard, she would run wildly, doing laps around the yard and the house until she could barely breathe. As a dog on a leash, running was just not part of the repertoire.

High School Hometown Ink!

2007-12-27T22:04:00.000-06:00

I got a very welcome surprise today in the form of a phonecall from a Farragut Press reporter. I graduated from Farragut High School (Go Admirals!) and decided to, in my press release blitz a couple of months ago, send press releases down to Tennessee, figuring I might be able to get some ink-by-association.

Turns out I was right! The friendly reporter interviewed me for about ten minutes (I hope I didn't say anything too dumb) and said it would hopefully appear in next week's issue.

I'm going to have to ask my parents to pick up a copy for me; I'll keep you posted!

Happy Holidays!

2007-12-24T16:19:00.000-06:00

As you can tell from the last couple of weeks--in which I've mainly posted my essays--my outgoing book promotion efforts (and results) are light right now during the holidays. The great news for me is that I have sold almost 100 books "from the trunk of my car" in the last 2 months, and that's in addition to the online sales from Amazon, et al.

What I have learned is that since I am relying on grass-roots methods, I have to work really hard while at the same time remain really patient. I look forward to trying some new things after the start of the year, like contacting some small radio talk shows and seeking new animal contacts that may have interest.

If you out there have any ideas for me, please e-mail me at the link on the right. As always, I would appreciate your telling your friends and family about the book!

To everyone out there who celebrates the holiday, I hope you have a very Merry Christmas!

Don't Take Candy From Strangers Who Are On Top of Your Roof

2007-12-19T14:29:00.001-06:00

Lesson Number 7: Everyone Deserves To Be Fussed Over Now and Then, or...How To Raise a Princess Dog, part FOUR

When we moved to Naperville, a neighbor recommended Petsmart, a pet supply store. She told me that they allowed—-nay, they welcomed-—pets on leashes while their owners shopped. This was quite exciting to me, and shortly after I spoke to my neighbor, I put Bijoux in the car for our first field trip.

Bijoux became immediately confused when, after the ten-minute drive, I not only stopped the car, but also talked to her as if she were leaving the car with me. I think she, probably due to her intense sense of smell and her recognition that other animals had been there before us, thought that we were at a veterinarian’s office instead of a Walt Disney World for dogs. When walked around to her side of the car, I attached the leash to her collar and said, “Come on!” She didn’t move a muscle; she merely sat there staring at me, as if to say, “Are you kidding?” It took some coaxing, but I finally got her out of the car. I let her sniff around for a few minutes in the parking lot, and then we headed towards the entrance.

Freaked out momentarily by the “whoosh” and the rapid movement of the double electric sliding doors as we stepped onto the entrance pad, Bijoux needed more coaxing in order to enter the store. Once we did, however, she suddenly became excited and tugged on her leash, dragging me behind her on her first exploration in many years of a retail store since Leewards in Norfolk, Virginia.

Bijoux sniffed excitedly while we explored the aisles and aisles of dog supplies, from food to toys to beds to rawhide bones. Every now and then I had to pull on her leash a bit, to keep her from helping herself to the many treats that were “conveniently” placed at doggie level.

While we were there, I decided to take her in to the grooming department to get her nails clipped. The friendly woman who took care of us spoke to Bijoux for the duration of our visit, and when she finished with the business of nail trimming, she asked me if she could give Bijoux a treat. I said yes, and was lucky enough to witness the first occurrence of one of the funniest habits Bijoux had: her refusal to take treats from strangers. The woman held a Milk Bone between her thumb and forefinger and offered it to Bijoux, and Bijoux sniffed once and then turned her head away. She kept talking to Bijoux, asking her if she wanted it, and Bijoux walked away from her. Finally, I took the treat from the woman, thanked her, and walked Bijoux out to the main part of the store.

When we reached the end of the aisle, I called Bijoux to come closer, kneeled down, and offered her the Milk Bone. She promptly took it from my hand and held it between her teeth. As we walked around the store she didn’t chew it; she calmly held it in her mouth, occasionally dropping it and picking it back up, until we reached the car. I opened the passenger door and she hopped up into her seat and then ate the bone.

From then on, her routine from taking treats in public, from strangers, or at the vet, was the same. She refused any and all treats unless one of her family members gave them to her.

When it came to treats (in either variety: doggie snacks or people snacks), Bijoux was a happy camper when anything came her way. A pet peeve of mine grew over time as she became “grabby”, yanking the treat from the hand of the person who fed her, so to speak. It was time for more training. I wanted to teach her the command “Nice”, as in “Be Nice”. Each time I had a treat for her, I commanded her first to sit or lay down. My next command was “Niiiiiiiice”, and as I held the treat slightly above her mouth, she eventually learned to delicately take it from me, just barely grasping it between her teeth. She waited until I completely released it to her before she chomped down and enjoyed it. Going further, I sometimes put her treat between my teeth and got down on her level. I said, “Niiiiiice” as well as I could, and she learned to take it gently from me in this way as well.

One very enjoyable routine I had with Bijoux was discovered after I taught her the command “Speak”. The basic “Speak” command entailed my giving the order and her barking once. After a while we spiced it up: after she barked, I asked, “What?” She wagged her tail and barked again. “What’d you say?” I asked, watching her grow both excited and impatient, barking so that I would relinquish whatever treat I had in my hand.

Talking to Bijoux was one of my favorite things about spending time with her. (BLOGNOTE: I realize that there might be some non-dog people out there who are curious about my stories anyway and, in reading this, are now completely convinced that I am a freak. I'm not...and offer no apologies. LOL)

Sometimes in play, she “talked” to me while I tried to “steal” her rawhide bone. First she barked in her normal way. As I brought my face closer to hers and the theft was inevitable, she tried to “talk me out of it” by whining. As I whined back it antagonized her even more, and she got louder and louder until I clamped down on her bone and she either growled at me (To tell me to go somewhere else and get my own bone; she wasn’t really in the mood) or released the bone and licked my face.

Julie had some great “conversations” with Bijoux as well. Not being satisfied with that old joke about asking your dog what’s on top of the house (Roof), Julie took it one step further. She reached back into her memory banks and pulled out the lyrics to the Bloodhound Gang hit “The Roof Is On Fire”. As she stood in front of Bijoux, Julie said “The” and waited for Bijoux to add the “Roof!” Sometimes it took a little longer than others, but when Bijoux “roofed”, Julie would say “Is on Fire!” Repeating this the three times that’s required when singing the original song, Julie always stopped before going on with the rest of the song, which didn’t require Bijoux’s talents and was also quite vulgar.

The Importance of a Wardrobe and Good Hair and Nails

2007-12-16T13:20:00.002-06:00

Lesson Number 7: Everyone Deserves To Be Fussed Over Now and Then, or...How To Raise a Princess Dog, part three

(BLOGNOTE: This one is a little fragmented...excuse the rough transitions; I am posting this as I last left it!)

Every princess values the way she looks, and always enjoys those special times when emphasis is placed upon her appearance. Or so I’ve heard. Frankly, we never would have wanted nor been able to afford the kind of dog which needed a regular grooming appointment with a professional. The biggest part of grooming Bijoux was trying to keep her nails clipped to a manageable length. Bathing her came in second, as nobody in the house likes a stinky dog. Further down on the list was brushing her, which is something I enjoyed doing when she was a puppy—not because it was something she needed—because it was quality time. Her coat was short and smooth by nature, and when our household life got filled with too many activities to handle in the time we had each day, I stopped brushing her. Bijoux hardly saw or felt her brush for years, getting treated to a stroking by brush only rarely.

One day, Julie asked if we had a brush for Bijoux. I told her where to find it, and she took Bijoux outside on the front porch. Bijoux sat down near Julie’s legs and reveled in the feel-good time as Julie brushed her. This became a tradition for them, and Princess Bijoux finally had a coat worthy of her status.

One of the important lessons one learns in raising a puppy is the attraction that said puppy has to any article of clothing belonging to its master. In many ways, it’s one of the methods a dog uses to indulge or pamper herself. Bijoux was no different. When we brought her home and said goodnight to her, we tucked her in with a blanket and one of our t-shirts. Part of the reason that socks were among her favorite toys to play with, I believe, was because we had worn them. It was no surprise, then, that we often found Bijoux nesting in our clean, freshly dried laundry. In fact, she made regular appearances (sometimes with muddy paws) not only on any huge pile of clean clothing that was waiting to be folded on the couch, but even in laundry baskets full of clean, folded clothing. I can’t count the number of times she actually dumped laundry baskets full of clean, folded clothing over, while trying to get in!

I also have a picture of Bijoux, cozy as could be, relaxing in my underwear and pajama drawer, which happened to be on the floor at the time because I had just sifted through it and refolded everything.

When she became sick, I tried to give her some comfort by leaving my robe on the couch so she could snuggle up in it while we were all gone for the day. I often returned home to find her entire body underneath the robe, with just her little face sticking out.

Bijoux went through a stage—or, rather, I went through a stage—where she enjoyed wearing different types of bandanas around her neck. I always thought it was hilarious to see dogs “dressed”, although I thought that the financial commitment that would be required to keep her in sweaters and such was not reasonable at all. I spent a couple of dollars on a pink bandana in the “Western Cowboy” style—with the paisley design and all—as well as a holiday bandana that was made specifically for dogs. Bijoux wore these bandanas daily, and they were quite the conversation pieces. After a while I “grew out of” my stage, and Bijoux went back to wearing her collar by itself. It wasn’t until about seven years later when Minnie stayed with us for a week that she again “got dressed”: I cut two funky pink and orange bandanas from some scrap I had in the closet, and the girls were twins during their visit.

Bijoux gave “neurotic” a whole new world of meaning in many different ways, but one of the funniest was her nail-biting tendency. I don’t remember her doing this for the first few years, however at some point in the middle of her life she was laying next to me on the couch and I heard a soft grinding noise. I looked down at her and noticed that she appeared to be chewing on her paw. I leaned in closer and took her paw in my hand to check it out. Her paw was disgustingly wet and slimy. I noticed that a couple of her nails were jagged, and then realized what she had been doing.

The next time we made a trip to the vet, I asked the doctor questions about her nail biting. I was told that I didn’t have anything to worry about, so I didn’t. Bijoux continued this habit for the rest of her life. It didn’t seem to be a nervous habit; for example, I didn’t notice her chewing on her nails on a car ride to the vet or upon being left home alone for the day. She seemed to bite her nails for two reasons: the first was to intentionally shorten them if it had been a while since I had her nails trimmed. The second reason for her habit appeared to me to be a way to fill time. It was not at all unusual for us to be sitting on the couch together (just as we were the first time I noticed the nail biting) as she gnawed away at her nails absent-mindedly, her eyes glazed over, in a sort of glorious ignorance of everyone and everything around her.

Click here for part 4!

Food, Glorious Food!

2007-12-13T06:51:00.002-06:00

Lesson Number 7: Everyone Deserves To Be Fussed Over Now and Then, or...How To Raise a Princess Dog, part two

Everyone who reads any material on dog ownership knows that table scraps are a big no-no. I understand this, in theory. As someone who grew up with three dachshunds in the house who commenced vomiting whenever they ingested something that wasn’t made for dogs, I had great intentions of following this Golden Rule for dogs.

Alas, but great intentions are often thwarted by a combination of reality and cuteness. Bijoux learned how to beg without actually going through the motions. Her legs were too long and gangly to sit up on her rear end and beg in the traditional canine method. As a puppy, she begged by barking. We curbed that bad habit, but as a very creative animal, she found a way around that. In her later years she refined the art of begging. If her subject (usually me) was sitting at the dining room table, she would stand at the side, wagging her tail and either sneezing or letting out a “Hrrumph”. When that got her nothing (as was the usual case), she would disappear from sight…but only for a minute. She was under the table, and in the next moment, her head would suddenly pop into my lap, where she would rest it as she looked at me with those eyes (See Lesson on Cuteness). Her upper half would be completely still, but her entire rear end would move along with the intensity of her tail wag. When she was completely annoying, we commanded her to “Go lay down!” She backed up, not taking her eyes off of what she desired, until her back feet stepped off of the hardwood floor onto our area rug, where she plopped her body down in one clumsy motion. Eventually she would slink back over, only to be sent out again.

We discovered that Bijoux had certain “favorite” people foods by trial and error; that is, when we accidentally left a full lunch or dinner plate too close to the edge of the table and walked away from it to grab the ketchup or other accompaniment, Bijoux would calmly sneak over to it and make a calm, collected, well-thought out attack. We would return to the table to catch her, paws on the chair to hold her up, gobbling food like there was no tomorrow. After being scolded, she would slink away…but the memory of the food she ate lasted forever. After each instance (if it was something she really enjoyed), her begging would dramatically increase in urgency.

One of her favorite foods throughout her life was toast with peanut butter and jelly on it. It was something about the smell combined with her memory of the taste and texture (from her first Grand Toast Theft). Whenever this was on my menu, she went ballistic. She sat and stared at me as I ate it, cocking her head to one side and then the other. If I looked at her, she would sometimes pick up one paw, as if to tell me, “Hey…shake my paw. I’m offering! And then you can reward me with some peanut butter and jelly toast!” Eventually, when that got her nothing, she commenced light whining. Gradually the whining would build up to a bark/sneeze combination. It was surely one of the cutest things I had ever seen, and always got the best of me. In her early years, I would wait until the cuteness got to be unbearable before I would treat her. Later on and until the day she died, I always saved the last corner of my peanut butter and jelly toast for Bijoux, no matter if she asked for it or not. Wait. Who am I kidding? She always asked for it.

Toast in its raw form was just plain bread. Bijoux didn’t care about the formality of using a toaster. I once returned home from work to find a torn, empty, plastic bread bag on the kitchen floor. Thinking back to the morning rush in the house, I marveled at my own stupidity, having left a brand new loaf of wheat bread on the kitchen counter, completely within Bijoux’s reach. Looking at her guilty little face, tail tucked between her legs as she backed away from me slowly, and noticing that she looked physically fine at this point, I decided that she had waited probably a whole five or ten seconds after I left the house to “make the kill”. The poor loaf of bread never had a chance.

The other food that was in Bijoux’s top two was rice. The story of her attachment to rice has a strange “full circle” quality. As a puppy, Bijoux had some intense and mysterious intestinal problems. For many weeks she was on a diet of broth, chicken, and white rice. She loved it.

Over the years, Jim became quite fond of making Stir Fry for dinner. When Bijoux caught a whiff of the rice, she was beside herself. I started to put some rice in a bowl for her, and she ate dinner “with us”. She became so excited about the rice that she devoured it quickly, practically without chewing or breathing. We noticed that after her rice binge, her chest seemed enormous before the rice worked its way through her system. After we made this discovery, we took some control over her rice meal. We allowed her to take a couple of bites, and then one of us would command her to “Sit”. She sat down right in front of her bowl, head hanging down towards her meal, ears dangling millimeters away from the rice, and waited. We let her sit there for a moment or two, to make sure she had swallowed and taken a breath, and then one of us would say, “Okay!” That was her signal to continue eating. We repeated this exercise three or four times, and she would walk away from her empty dish satisfied, but not overly plump as before.

In her final months of life, she wouldn’t eat her dog food. Desperate for her to get something in her stomach, I cooked chicken and rice, and sometimes scrambled eggs, for her daily. At the end she wouldn’t even touch the rice, and I understood that she wouldn’t live much longer.

Click here for part 3!

Deja-vu, All Over Again!

2007-12-11T16:37:00.000-06:00

I found out yesterday that the book also appeared in the Wheaton/Glen Ellyn Glancer, the sister magazine (and almost identical twin on the inside) of the Naperville Glancer. So yay!

Finally, Another Appearance in the Press...

2007-12-09T21:32:00.000-06:00

Yay...a friend told me on Friday evening that another of my press releases paid off; Remembering Ruby was in the Naperville Glancer. She was kind enough to bring me her copy this morning.

I didn't scan it for the blog because it's basically a recap of the newspaper article of a few weeks ago (they basically formatted my press release and printed it on 1/3 of a page in the magazine), but I am really excited that it's in there; besides it being more publicity which is always a good thing, I really, really like the magazine! So yay Ruby!

How To Raise a Princess Dog

2007-12-06T08:05:00.003-06:00

Lesson Number Seven: Everyone Deserves To Be Fussed Over, Now and Then…Or, How To Raise A Princess Dog, Part one

Bijoux’s status as a Princess was cemented firmly in place even before we parked the pickup truck outside on that very first night we brought her home. As such, that meant that extreme care would be taken to ensure that certain things happened to enhance her quality of life. Now, we weren’t completely over the edge; we didn’t build her an air-conditioned doghouse or feed her filet mignon for dinner, but we—I, especially—certainly didn’t bring her into our home as an animal that was merely to be tolerated and patted on the head once or twice a day.

The first important order of business, after all of her basic physical needs had been met, was to make sure she had a proper AKC name. Her rank as a purebred beagle affiliated with the American Kennel Club mattered to nobody, really. We had no intention of showing her, and we certainly had no plans to breed her. In fact, we were having her spayed as soon as it was possible to do so. I think the level of urgency upon which I had placed on registering her with the AKC stemmed from my experience as a young girl with Willie and Sandy. When they were born, my sister Julie and I wanted to give Willie the name “Cloud”, because of the smeary white markings on his back. Our “brilliant” idea was promptly shot down by our parents, who instead decided on the very regal-sounding names “Sir Sandor von Dapple” and Sir Wilhelm von Dapple”. Julie and I didn’t like the names, but as we were not in charge at the time, we had no choice but to let it go.

When it was my turn, then, to bestow a meaningful name on my own pet, I took it very seriously. Jim and I had already chosen her first name; now we just needed something more. I suggested “Aurora” as her middle name. I had always been a fan of mythology, and Aurora was the Goddess of the Dawn. I told Jim that this name was appropriate because Bijoux got us up everyday at sunrise. Having noticed that many AKC names end with something that gives a hint about a long and distinguished line of ancestors, we brainstormed a bit and finally came up with “Our Lady”. It was only right, Jim rationalized, because Bijoux really acted like she was one of us, a person. I promptly sent in the AKC registration form and a check. When we received the paperwork back—indicating that “Bijoux Aurora, Our Lady” was indeed now an official, registered member of the American Kennel Club—I took that very important envelope and put it…right in the file cabinet. It’s still in our safe deposit box, to this very day.

To say that Bijoux was “particular” about things would be a massive understatement. While occasionally frustrating, most of the time I found her finicky ways to be quite hilarious. The Milk Bone Company manufactures a treat called “Flavor Snacks”. These are in the shape of traditional Milk Bone dog treats but in five special flavors, which were, at the time, chicken, beef, turkey, lamb, and vegetable. Bijoux would eat every flavor except vegetable. I handed her a treat, and she hungrily tossed it to the back of her mouth and chewed like crazy until she was able to swallow it…unless I had tried to give her the green one. She sniffed at it tentatively, occasionally touching it with the tip of her tongue, and then she turned her head away from my hand. What nerve! I ended up throwing away boxes of Flavor Snacks, completely empty except for one layer of vegetable-flavored snacks that lined the bottom. Finally, we moved on to other dog treats.

At times, Bijoux’s failure to be the boss on a continual basis caused her to pout in her own doggie kind of way. Normally she would merely walk away, tail down, and not looking us in the eye at all. There were a couple of times in her life, however, when she definitely made a bigger impression.

Other than the Couch Incident, which I believe was started out of just plain “puppyness” and developed into a sort of retribution for being left home alone for hours at a time, the earliest indication of her demanding our respect appeared on one summer day in 1990. Jim and I walked to our local K-mart, which was only about one mile away from home. Why we walked there is now a mystery to me, a detail completely lost in the shuffle. Oddly enough, I do remember that we went there to purchase a new shower curtain and a set of shower curtain rings. The day was very hot and, as we had no air conditioning, the windows were open to the screens and we had a couple of fans running to try to circulate the air. We had been playing with the Princess that morning and had decided that as we wouldn’t be gone very long, we’d not put her in her crate. We took her outside so she could relieve herself, and then put her back inside. Not having a clue about her mischievous persona at this point, we said, “See you later, alligator!” and left the house as she watched us from her perch on top of the couch.

We returned less than an hour later with our shower curtain and rings, and as Jim unlocked the door, Bijoux was right there, complete with wagging tail and yelps of joy. It only took a second or two before our noses noticed the offensive smell. Bijoux had obviously left a “gift” somewhere in the house. It wasn’t the first time, nor would it be the last; anyone raising a puppy expects accidents now and then.

It was actually the placement of this gift that boggled our minds and is still a story that we laugh about. As we made our way through the doorway and into the house, we found it. She had placed herself in front of the large box fan that was standing on the floor in the living room—set on its highest setting due to the heat of the day—and left a stinky mess less than 10 inches from the face of the fan. The smell was then carried throughout the entire house. To this day I’m unsure exactly how she was able to do that without being blown across the room. As we tried everything we could think of to quickly air out a stinky house on a hot summer day, we wondered to ourselves if she could have had the intelligence to do what she did intentionally…but how could it not have been done intentionally? From that day on, we gave her more credit for the process of thought than most people would find normal!

Click here for part 2!

Cute=Good...Or Not?

2007-12-03T07:06:00.001-06:00

Lesson Number Six: Cuteness CAN Get You What You Want (Or...Choose Your Battles)

Everyone’s a sucker for a Cute puppy. Those eyes—Puppy Dog Eyes—are famous for a reason. “Don’t look at me with those Puppy Dog Eyes!” The manipulative qualities of Puppy Dog Eyes are infinite in nature. Besides the eyes, puppies have lots of Cuteness: floppy ears, a particularly adorable tail, tiny teeth, the way they prance, the way they fall all over themselves when they are running, the tricks they can quickly learn when they figure out that there are rewards involved, and those paws! These, and many additional things (depending on the dog and the sensibilities of the owner), not only melt a master’s heart in seconds, but also can sometimes be the very reason why puppies are not trained properly. Cuteness—there are two kinds of it: natural and learned—breeds inconsistency…unless you’re careful!

It can be quite tempting to just let a puppy do whatever she wants to do, merely because of its C.F., or Cute Factor. When you first bring a puppy home, almost everything she does is about a “ten” on the C.F. scale of one to ten:
• Look, she’s curling up on a blanket!
• Look, she’s eating her food!
• Look how cute she is while she’s drinking her water!
• Isn’t that simply amazing, the way she tugs on that squeaky toy?
• Uh-oh, she peed on the carpet! Bad girl! Ooh, but you’re so CUTE!

After a time, though, puppy owners, just like new parents, must be sure to separate Natural Cuteness from Learned Cuteness. They arrive at a figurative Fork in the Road. Some owners take the Wrong Fork. They make a semi-serious effort to train their dog and subsequently give up because it’s “too hard” (and even sometimes because they don’t want to hurt their puppy’s feelings with the Tough Love that training requires!) and their dog is just “too Cute”. Some owners take the Right Fork. These owners are rewarded handsomely because they train themselves first, and then use consistency to teach their dog right from wrong.

Jim and I definitely wanted to take the Right Fork. It was important to us to balance Bijoux’s sky-high Natural C.F. rating with solid discipline and training so that her behavior would stay in check, and thus, her Learned C.F. (her ability to get what she wanted by just being cute) would be low on the scale. After studying “Superpuppy”, I was sure that we were up to the task at hand. We, having no children yet, spent much of our free time each day with Bijoux, balancing play with behavior management. There were some bumps in the road, however; i.e. the Couch Incident and Bijoux’s ability to “Cute” herself into bed with us. Over time I slowly realized, because Bijoux showed me, that people can bend rules occasionally and still stay on the Right Fork. Learned Cuteness can sometimes be, well, Cute.

Generally, we praised Bijoux as much as possible (when she deserved it, of course!), and when she misbehaved, we disciplined her but were quick to forgive her Little Cute Self. (I was definitely quicker than Jim, though; I’m the Softy) Once we came out of the “New Puppy Fog”, we achieved great balance, but only after we started choosing our battles.

Cute? When Bijoux would actually make it from one trip outside to the next, without soiling the floor. Not Cute? Well, you guessed it. As with all puppies, we had good days and bad days in the housebreaking department. Cute? When we hung a ribbon filled with jingle bells from the handle on the sliding glass door in back as well as on the front entrance to our home, and taught Bijoux to ring them with her nose when she had to do her business. It took time; each time we took her outside we’d say, “Do you want to go outside?” and then gently hit her nose against the bells. It was a relatively easy lesson for her to learn, and it was a charming trick to show visitors. Battle won.

Cute? When Bijoux would run outside in the yard, suddenly put her nose to the ground, and roll on her back, rubbing her body into the grass beneath her. Not Cute: when Bijoux would come to the door and smell like who-knows-what because of some kind of stinky bug (or something!) she had been rolling in.

Cute? When I would then give her a bath and then sprayed her with one of my sweet-smelling Bath and Body Works products as she sneezed and stared at me sheepishly, seeming to feel remorse for her actions. Not Cute: when, thirty minutes later, she would beg to go outside again, acting like she had to urinate, and then perform the same rolling act in a different, yet just as stinky, area of grass. One summer I was bathing her three or four times in a day because I couldn’t stand her smell. Leaving her outside for the day was out of the question; it was too hot. Battle lost. I gave up; how do you keep an Animal (In Bijoux’s defense, I often told Jim “Don’t forget, she is an Animal,” and ten minutes later I was claiming to have had a meaningful, non-verbal exchange with my Girl. I truly felt like we understood each other.) from doing what comes naturally? In some cases, it’s not worth trying. I kept the Dog Shampoo industry in business for years.

Cute? Bijoux’s ability to catch things, like tennis balls and, in winter, snowballs. Not Cute? A dog that constantly begs for you to toss food at her. Cute? Her Puppy Dog Eyes, upon smelling and hearing that you’re microwaving popcorn for dessert. Cuter? Her ability to leap up and catch said popcorn. Battle lost. Or won? It depends on who you ask. There were challenges everyday, and making the decision about which issues could slide and which weren’t to be negotiated was only one of the many joys of having a dog in the house.

Me-1, NaBloPoMo-0

2007-11-30T19:45:00.000-06:00

Well, NaBloPoMo is over for 2007. I successfully updated my page on NaBloPoMo daily, and kept up with this blog and Suburban Scrawl practically everyday. It was fun, but I'm happy to be back down to 2 blogs instead of 3! Whew!

Friends Til the End

2007-11-29T08:01:00.001-06:00

Lesson Number 5: You've Gotta Have Friends, part two

In April, Jim finished his sea duty rotation and was stationed at Great Lakes Naval Base in North Chicago, Illinois for shore duty. I had just graduated from college, so we packed up our stuff and moved north. My parents lived in Milwaukee at that time, and invited us, along with their “Granddog”, to stay with them so we could take extra time to find a place to live. We were happy for the offer but nervous about Bijoux meeting Dapple, who was thirteen years old at the time, and Willie and Sandy, her eleven-year-old sons. Because the three miniature dachshunds were so much older, we weren’t sure how they would respond to our puppy, or she to them. My mom was nervous also, and we put much thought into the introduction. Mom and Dad lived across the street from a big field, and when we arrived at the house I took Bijoux there, to wait for the others. A few minutes later, my mom crossed the street with the three dachshunds on their leashes. They barked and as I remember it, Bijoux was nervous and slightly overwhelmed. My mom and I got down on the ground with the dogs—something that my dad still laughs about to this day—and let them sniff each other before we all went into the house. From that point on, although the age difference prevented any real interest in playing together, the four dogs tolerated one another just fine. Whenever Bijoux “got out of line” by trying to impose her puppy self on Dapple, Dapple would growl and snap, and Bijoux invariably ended up just lying down—completely still and calm—next to her.

Occasionally, Bijoux’s “friends” weren’t of the canine variety. She would smell a rabbit or a squirrel nearby and take off running, trying to find it. If we happened to be inside the house, she would whine and paw at the door, as if she were a bull trying to get out of confinement. When she was after something, she could get all the way across the yard practically before the screen door could re-latch itself!

When Jim left the Navy for a civilian job in 1995, we moved to our current town. Bijoux was a real trooper about the move (this was her 4th house in five years!), and we were overjoyed when we learned that our new neighbors brought a puppy into their home. His name was Rudy, and he was a Boxer. Although Rudy and Bijoux rarely played in the same yard, they spent hours running back and forth along their respective side of the chain-link fence that was between them. In fact, occasionally they had another partner in crime: that fall our older son was three and a half, and even he was astounded at how much fun he could have, running alongside a fence with two dogs!

We moved away from Rudy in 1997, to the other side of town. Unfortunately, it would be three more years before Bijoux “found” another friend. This one, however, would carry her to the end. Minnie was a Schnoodle (schnauzer/poodle mix), and she was adorable. My friend brought Minnie into her home directly from the breeder, and we introduced her to Bijoux almost immediately. At this point, Bijoux was an “old girl” of ten, which made Minnie the “young whippersnapper”. I was uncertain at first about whether Bijoux would accept Minnie (and whether her 50+ pounds would crush Minnie’s 7 pounds!), but as it turned out, I was silly for worrying about it. Bijoux knew what she was doing, and although she began her friendship with Minnie in a diva-like attitude, she learned to “leave her ego at the door”. The first time that Minnie came to our house, the dogs were racing around within 30 minutes. It was definitely reminiscent of Bijoux’s relationship with Rex, only this time Bijoux was in charge. I laughed as she continuously pushed Minnie to the ground with her chin, just as Rex had done ten years before, and when she tired of playing, she would growl at Minnie, letting her know that Playtime was over. To me, this was better than television, and nobody could understand how I could just sit and watch two dogs play for as long as I did. The truth is, it not only gave me a good laugh, but I was genuinely so happy for Bijoux, as she was having such a great time and finally getting some quality exercise!

Minnie became a regular visitor to our home, and that Thanksgiving we took care of her for four days while her family went to Ohio. I had no problem leaving the two dogs home alone together if I needed to do so, and now and then we would take them both for a car ride. As our family relaxed in the family room, Bijoux and Minnie would often sleep curled up next to each other. It was a sweet picture.

Two more dogs came into our lives at Christmas time, and coincidentally they were both beagles! Buddy was a Christmas gift for our next-door neighbor’s son, and Maxie was the family dog of our friends who lived on the next block.

Buddy was the only dog I have ever seen Bijoux run from upon first sniff. He was an adorable puppy and, in fact, resembled the puppy that Bijoux used to be. But looks didn’t mean anything to her. Bijoux became immediately annoyed at Buddy’s bark, his nipping, and his pouncing. In fact, he made her downright nervous! She did everything she could to get away from him, all while he did everything he could to get near her. Not wanting to force the issue, we just prevented Bijoux from being on the same side of the fence with Buddy. He was persistent, though…he would stand on his side of the fence, howling at her, begging her to come over to him. She wouldn’t give him the time of day.

Maxie was a different story. Also a spirited sort of beagle—-one eye always had to be on her when there was food in the area because she was known for jumping up onto a dining room chair and eating whatever was on the table—-Maxie eventually became an accepted friend. Maxie was another dog, to Jim’s initial dismay, that I offered to care for while her family was on vacation. Bijoux and Maxie didn’t run around the house together; Maxie had shorter legs and moved much faster than Bijoux could. It seemed as though, somehow, Bijoux had let Maxie know that although she was welcome in our home, her youthful silliness would be neither tolerated nor acknowledged. Their relationship mostly consisted of an initial greeting, tails wagging, and then mere glances across the room in a simple parallel existence.

As time passed, Minnie continued her frequent visits, and we would often have her over for the day for no other reason than to keep Bijoux’s company. Minnie made Bijoux happy, and in the spring of 2001 we would find out that she was good for Bijoux in other ways as well.

I took Bijoux to Dr. Heflin for her yearly check-up and shots in May. As always, the first item on the agenda was to weigh her. I did a double take when I saw the scale hit 46 pounds. When I expressed concern (and a little panic!) at the read, Dr. Heflin checked Bijoux’s records from the last time she visited, in the summer of 2000. Indeed, she had weighed in at a hefty 53 pounds (Blognote: Bijoux was overweight but was indeed a large beagle, unlike Roxie, our current beagle who is a waif-like 27 pounds). Dr. Heflin also became slightly alarmed, and as we discussed what could be happening, I realized that it was quite possible that Bijoux had finally lost her extra weight because of her new, intense exercise regimen: running around like a crazy dog with her friend Minnie two to three times each week. Dr. Heflin agreed, but recommended blood work, just to be sure. When I received the call three days later, I learned that the tests showed nothing to be concerned about; in fact, they indicated that Bijoux was quite healthy, especially for her age. With a sigh of relief, we went on with life: although over the next 2 years Bijoux and Minnie ran together less and less due to Bijoux’s advanced age, she remained at a healthy weight.

More importantly, it was Minnie who always got Bijoux to perk up near the end. Her visits were lovely surprises to Bijoux, and I am so thankful for that.

Arigato, Amazon Japan!

2007-11-26T16:02:00.000-06:00

Do you live in Japan? Here's the Amazon listing you can use to get Ruby:

Remembering Ruby in Japan

I have no idea what the listing says, but it's fun to look at! LOL

Ruby Has Been Located in Australia...

2007-11-26T15:54:00.000-06:00

I received a wonderful e-mail a couple of weeks ago from J.M. in Australia. She wrote to give me a couple of links for acquiring Remembering Ruby in the Land Down Under. One of them is called Seekbooks.com.au and the other is fishpond.com.au. I'm not sure if the cost of the book plus the shipping is reasonable, because I don't know how the US dollar translates into an Aussie dollar.

At any rate, I'm happy to know that it's available there! Thanks so much, J.M.!

Some Nice Words From a Nice Woman!

2007-11-24T16:01:00.000-06:00

I am very lucky to have some great reviews posted up on the Amazon site for Remembering Ruby. This one was just posted yesterday by Carolyn Sterner of Cascade Beagle Rescue-East (and a Special Education Teacher & Behavior Analyst in the New Jersey Public School System):

"For those who have lost a pet, we know the devastation it can bring, and at times the embarrasment experienced for feeling this way about "just a dog" or "just a cat." Remembering Ruby is a great resource for families to help them not only understand that it is OK to love your pets and experience loss when they leave us, but to give some ideas about how to deal with that loss in a positive way. It is written quite simply, and is filled with photographs. Since we have not figured out how to extend the lives of our pets, and pets continue to grow in importance in the lives of families, this book is a fabulous resource to be added to any household library. We are adding Remembering Ruby to our website's Suggested Readings list and will recommend it to our family of adopters and volunteers, who will go through this loss if they bring a pet into their lives."

Thankful For The Memories...Today and Everyday!

2007-11-22T08:26:00.002-06:00

Lesson Number Five: You’ve Gotta Have Friends, part 1

I always wanted the kind of dog that would have doggy friends. Was that a crazy idea? Many people might think so, but “dog people” know what I mean. I wanted a dog that I could visit friends with, a dog that wouldn’t go ballistic at the sight of another dog. I was determined to introduce Bijoux to as many other dogs as I could, and over her long life she had many canine friends, the first of which was Rex.

Rex was an English springer spaniel, about one-and-a-half years old. He was a good deal bigger than our puppy, but they got along famously. Rex’s owner, my friend Dawn, and I were close and saw each other practically on a daily basis. They lived just two blocks away, which made visits extremely convenient. Rex was quite rowdy, and I think Bijoux’s visits did Dawn and her husband Scott a huge service because she wore him out for them! Rex and Bijoux had a simple, specific routine they would follow: we’d arrive, and less than five minutes later, the two dogs were tearing through the house, chasing each other. Once caught, they rolled around on the floor (and sometimes the couch!), mouths wide open, drooling all over each other. Rex always tried to push Bijoux down with his chin, proving his dominance. Eventually the chase expanded to both floors of Dawn and Scott’s townhouse, and Bijoux raced down the stairs, Rex on her heels, sounding a lot more like elephants than dogs. Occasionally they couldn’t turn fast enough at the bottom of the stairs, and they tumbled into the wall. It didn’t even stun them: they kept right on going! Often they played like this for hours, and when we left, their fur was always damp from slobbering.

Her play dates with Rex were such a big part of Bijoux’s life that she even knew how to get to his house on her own, as I found out the hard way. Rex and Dawn had come to our house one day for a visit. About a minute or two after they left, I opened the front door again for some reason, and Bijoux slipped out. She ran, possessed, through my neighbor’s yard as I took off after her. She was so determined to get to her destination that I couldn’t catch up to her. I chased her through the neighborhood as everyone outside watched and laughed, and she didn’t stop until she got to Dawn’s porch. Dawn and Rex had just completed the walk from our house and were going inside when Bijoux met them. Although I scolded her for running away, I secretly found her spunk very amusing, and found it amazing that she knew how to find her friend.

Dawn gave birth to her son Nicholas that November, and Bijoux had her first exposure to an infant. Although Dawn was a typical first-time mom in that she didn’t want dogs licking her baby all the time, she was quite generous in allowing Bijoux to have access to Nick. I believe that her learning how to control herself around Nick—an unpredictable baby—while she was still a puppy made Bijoux completely tolerant of children and their antics, and set the foundation for her eventual transition from “our baby” to our Family Dog.

February 3, 1991 marked Bijoux’s First Birthday. Being a doting dog owner (and yes, a bit cuckoo), I decided to make a big deal out of the day. Jim and Scott were out to sea on their respective Navy ships, and I invited Dawn, Nick, and Rex to our house for a little party. Dawn and I tended to get quite silly when we were together, and this day was no exception. I had picked up pink birthday party hats for the occasion, and we all put them on—dogs included—and I took photos.

When it was time to play, I pulled a cardboard roll out of my stash and let the dogs tug on it. I had also purchased party blowers, and Rex and Bijoux tried to grab the end as I blew it out. Eventually I posed Bijoux with a blower hanging out of her mouth and snapped one of the funniest pictures I have from her whole long life.

For dessert, I served Dawn and myself a bag of M & M’s, and Rex and Bijoux snacked on Frosty Paws, an ice cream-like frozen treat especially made for dogs. I thought this was a great invention, and the dogs enjoyed it immensely. By the end of the evening, I was certain that Rex and Bijoux could have done without all of the party activities (except the Frosty Paws, which eventually became a regular treat!), but Dawn and I still laugh about the memories that were made.

Click here for part 2!

Chicagoland "Virtual" Ink!

2007-11-21T14:40:00.000-06:00

I want to extend a hearty "Welcome!" to any newcomers that found me via Chicagoist...or any other avenues, of course!

Take a look at previous blog entries to read about my progress through the process of getting the book published and marketed, and if you want, click on the label "Lessons Learned from the Life of a Princess Dog" to read stories about Bijoux, the real Ruby.

If you have any questions, don't hesitate to contact me...click "E-mail me!" to the right.

Happy Thanksgiving!

A Shoutout To The Land Down Und-ah!

2007-11-20T12:35:00.000-06:00

I have met some incredible people through blogging, even though I've only been at it for a relatively short time. Katie is one of them. Katie--along with Kat--was among my first two bloggy friends (I can't remember who was first: doesn't matter!). Katie, like me, has two blogs. I found her doggy bloggy first; it's called "A Blog By Thy Dog". Her blog follows the activities going on with Phoenix and Sahara, her gorgeous canines.

It was only waaaaaay later that I realized she has another blog which is all about assorted other things going on in her life. That one is called "Made in Melbourne" (a title which, I must admit, is confusing because she is a transplanted Brit. Katie: doesn't that mean your blog should be called Made in the UK? Please explain. LOL). I enjoy reading both blogs immensely.

Check out one or both of Katie's blogs! And tell her that Melisa sent ya!

Thank Goodness!

2007-11-17T08:22:00.000-06:00

Six of us had dinner here in Tucson at PF Chang’s last night (Yummy!). When the server brought our plate of fortune cookies, I grabbed mine first. My fortune?

“Your efforts will be worthwhile.”

Yay!

More West Suburban Ink!

2007-11-16T08:58:00.000-06:00

If you are a reader of my sister’s blog, The House of Jules, this will be day-old news to you…

I was very, very excited to find out that my book would be featured in the Local Lit section of our newspaper, The Naperville Sun! Expecting just a little teeny, tiny blurb, I was flabbergasted when Julie e-mailed me yesterday morning to let me know that the article takes up half the page! Being all the way on the other side of the country (I’m in Tucson, Arizona…you knew that, right??), I was thrilled when Julie scanned the article so I could see it for myself! Yippee!!

Only 1% Watchdog

2007-11-13T16:23:00.002-06:00

Lesson Number Four: The Family That Plays Together Stays Together

Anyone who has ever had a puppy in the house will tell you that there are hundreds of different ways to be entertained. Although we allowed her to play tug-of-war with a pair of socks that we had knotted together, we needed to find other permissible items to keep her busy so that she wouldn’t end up, say, ripping our dirty laundry to shreds or putting more holes in our couch. We were constantly coming up with new games to play with Bijoux, especially once it had been established that squeaky toys were definitely not part of our future.

Next to squeaky toys, most puppies love balls. They love the unpredictability of the movement. They love to squeak them, roll them, push them with their nose, chase them, and fetch them. We soon discovered that a tennis ball was a great toy, because Bijoux didn’t rip into it (not right away, anyway…after a while, tennis balls had a short life in our home before they were too badly chewed to bounce!)…As an added bonus, they were inexpensive.

Since Bijoux, at that time, was our only “baby”, we came home from work and school every evening, ate dinner, and spent the next couple of hours before bedtime playing with her and that tennis ball. We spent countless hours throwing the ball so she could fetch it, and it was always fun to see if she was in the mood to bring it back to us for another throw, or run madly in the opposite direction, persuading us to chase her down. As one of us zoomed in on her to grab the ball, she would crouch down on her front legs with her rear end up in the air, and she’d wait until we were thisclose before veering off to one side and taking off again.

When it was too cold or too dark to play outside, Jim and I sat on opposite ends of the living room and played “Monkey in the Middle” with Bijoux. Each time, she eventually grew tired of running back and forth, chasing a ball that would rarely be hers, and she sat in the middle of the room just staring at us as if to say, “Next game, please?”

As she grew bigger and stronger, Bijoux could fit the entire tennis ball in her mouth. While we played, she would come towards us, ball in mouth, and then stop. She would gaze at us, eyes blinking, as she opened and closed her mouth, loosening and tightening her grip on the ball. She could squeeze and squash the ball in her mouth, as someone would squeeze a stress-relief ball in his hands. We think it was her form of “intimidation”, but it was so cute!

Eventually Bijoux learned to catch the tennis ball in her mouth. The “Plop!” sound it made as she captured it was quite funny. After she was good at catching the ball, “Monkey in the Middle” was much more fun for her, as she leapt from her position to grab the ball from mid-air.

The tug-of-war with a pair of knotted socks was always a hit, but when Bijoux got a hold of a single sock and took off running, it was always a different game. Eventually she learned which socks were hers to play with and which ones she couldn’t. (In her later years, she would playfully pick up one of our socks, off limits to her, and gently, teasingly, “chew” on it until we took it out of her mouth. One of our favorite things to do with a sock was open it up and shove it over her entire nose. She would often then just sit and look at us with the sock all the way up to those pleading eyes, the other end hanging pitifully from the end of her nose. Sometimes she allowed us to put the sock on her; other times she would playfully dodge us. Other times she opened her mouth as wide as she could, so we could only get the sock over her upper jaw, and she clamped down on the sock so we couldn’t take it off and try again.

Occasionally, we decided to provide Bijoux with a fun challenge. We took two of her favorite toys—the tennis ball and the sock—and combined them. We teased her with the tennis ball and then shoved it way down into the toe of the sock, and then let her struggle to get it out. It provided us all with hours of entertainment, to be sure.

During Bijoux’s first holiday season, even wrapping presents became more fun. One day I finished off a jumbo roll of gift-wrap and looked down to see Bijoux take off running with the cardboard roll. I gave chase and she ran through our townhouse, only slowing down occasionally when she had to cock her head to the side to fit the roll through the doorways. Eventually I caught her and grabbed the roll from her mouth. She barked and barked, wagging her tail, encouraging me to toss the roll.

I held the cardboard roll with one hand and repeatedly hit my other palm with it as I chased her through the house, and we played with that paper treasure until it was shredded to bits. From then on she even got excited about an empty paper towel roll. Easy to please, our dog was!

As the mall filled with holiday shoppers that first year, I didn’t have to look too hard to find the “perfect” gift for our puppy. She loved rawhide bones and I found one that was about three feet long, in the shape of a candy cane. I even wrapped it (and the empty gift wrap roll was a bonus for her!). When we gave her this gift, we were shocked to find that she was actually afraid of it because it was so large! It was much bigger than she was!

A couple of days went by before she even got near it, and even then she only nipped at it before leaping away. After a couple more days, she started dragging it through the house, and at that point she chewed on it for hours. That three-foot-long rawhide bone was gone in about three short days! The Jumbo Bone became a holiday tradition that lasted for the next ten years.

One day, completely by accident, we discovered the joys of “tormenting” Bijoux with light. The face of Jim’s watch had caught the reflection of the sun, and the tiny light spot it created on the floor and wall as Jim moved his arm caught Bijoux’s attention. We were having a conversation, and suddenly Bijoux jumped up from her nap on the couch and pounced on the floor. It took us a minute or two to realize what she was after, because we were laughing so hard at her swift change from complete relaxation to “attack mode”, but once we figured it out, things were never the same at our house! It was a happy accident, and Jim used his watch to lead a light spot across the floor so Bijoux would chase it and attack it with her overgrown puppy paws. We giggled as Jim made the light zig zag across the floor at different speeds as Bijoux pursued it. My parents thought this was a cruel game, but we thought it made her happy. Eventually, what originated as only a daytime game evolved into nighttime entertainment when we brought a flashlight into play. Bijoux enjoyed this for years and years, until she became a “senior citizen” and grew tired of our little game.

On occasion, we needed no props to conduct a play session with Bijoux. We were fond of crawling towards her, placing our mouth on one of her paws, and singing “Doo doo doo!” in a high-pitched tone. This drove her completely batty, and at first she only pulled her paw away from her tormenter. When the torture continued, she was prone to yelping as if to say, “Leave me alone!” After a while, she would alternate yelping with a high-pitched whine, and I began imitating her, starting out with a low growl that worked up to a whine. We were quite the pair, “talking” to each other like we did. Of course, just as we didn’t see the consequences of her “adorable” digging habits, we also didn’t anticipate that “Doo doo doo-ing” on her paws would make her extremely nervous when we took her to a groomer for nail clipping.

We realized that although Bijoux was great at “protecting” me from Jim in case of a tickle fight, she was quite useless in defending our humble abode. When visitors knocked on our door, Bijoux barked as if she were typical watchdog. When we let people in, however, Bijoux jumped up to greet them, wagging her tail and licking them as if they were long-lost relatives. If a burglar ever broke into our home, she’d wag her tail and escort them out with anything they wished to carry, licking them all the way to the car. She had proven to be 99% Companion and only 1% Watchdog, and that was fine with me.

More Internet Search Results...

2007-11-13T16:14:00.001-06:00

Here are even more cool places where you can find my book:
Knowmore.com
Amazon in France
Amazon in Germany...Prima!

I think it's kind of amazing, the whole spider-webby path my book has taken around the internet sellers. While it's awesome to see that my book can be found in so many places because each place makes it available to more and more people, it boggles my mind at the same time.

I'm putting up another piece of my Lessons Learned From the Life of a Princess Dog (in a seperate post) before I go on my mini-vacation. We're leaving early tomorrow (Wednesday) morning and will return late Sunday night. We are taking a laptop and I will do my best to post, but we'll see what happens. Arizona, here we come!

La...Ti Da...Ti Da!

2007-11-09T22:08:00.000-06:00

Every few days I do a few internet searches to see if anyone new is talking about the book, and also to see if any publications have printed information or a review, basically because I'm an impatient person (but working on it). I have found lots and lots of internet sellers that now offer the book, most of which have names I don't recognize, but...

I found something WAY cool just now. The book is available at TARGET.COM!!
I created something that you can get at Target! Woo Wooooooo! Can I get a What-what??

Long Live Happy*!

*The book was not in this commercial. Don't worry; you didn't blink and miss it or anything. I just added the ad (ha!) for ambiance.

The Couch Incident

2007-11-09T06:36:00.002-06:00

Lesson Number Three: Don’t Start Something You Don’t Want To Finish, part 2

Puppies are funny creatures. They are furry and floppy and clumsy and depend completely on their master to teach them the ways of the world. Their cuteness can often make them difficult to train in a consistent manner, and their mischievous ways can, if you’re not careful, bloom into big trouble.

Almost everyone who ever got to know Bijoux would testify that we couldn’t have trained her any better than we did. I divide the credit between our diligence and consistency and the fact that Bijoux was an awesome animal that accepted lessons easily. There were, however, some mistakes along the way.

At the store on Bijoux’s first night in our home, I purchased some squeaky toys. Every puppy has to have squeaky toys. Not only is the soft plastic fun for them to chew, but also they love the power that comes with learning how to make the toy sound off! We played with those squeaky toys until they couldn’t squeak anymore, literally. Even after I got up off of the floor and walked away, Bijoux would continue to chew on them. Eventually she would get the squeaker out, and it appeared that she was wondering to herself why the toy “didn’t work” anymore. Rather than encourage play with a variety of toys, we kept buying new squeaky ones for her. And she kept ruining them. Finally, the only toys other than knotted up socks—which she loved—that she could play with, without our being worried about her choking, were the hard rubber bones and other shapes that the manufacturer claimed were “indestructible”.

We had to find something new to play. One day I discovered her “digging” in the sheets on the bed. It was adorable: her paws dug rapidly while her eyes didn’t move from whatever she was intent to find, all the while her floppy ears shook with the motions of her body. Common sense left me when I found this captivating sight, and I began to encourage her. There we would spend playtime, alternating between tug-of-war with the socks and both of us digging on the bed. She never actually tore sheets with her nails; it was just harmless digging. Or so I thought.

Then, the Couch Incident happened. I returned home from school one day to find something terrible. Bijoux had apparently been bored and in need of some playtime. Our couch, her perch from which she kept an eye on the neighborhood and from which she would look for me coming up the walk at the end of the day, had a hole in it. It was a small hole, but a hole nonetheless. I brought her to it and reprimanded her, even though I was pretty certain she wouldn’t take me seriously, since I didn’t catch her in the act. I hoped that she understood that this was a no-no.

The next day before I left for school, I put a folded blanket on top of the hole, not realizing whom I was dealing with. When I came home, not only was the hole a little bit bigger, but also the blanket was all bunched up in the middle of the couch. “Ah-ha!” I thought, “She was nesting in the blanket!” When I left the next day, I bunched the blanket up for her and put it on top of the hole. Arriving home, I was dismayed, but not surprised, to find a bigger hole and the blanket in the middle of the couch again.

I made a trip to the pet store (with Bijoux in tow) to get a product called Grannick’s Bitter Apple. The horrible taste of it was supposed to deter dogs from destroying things. I thought my problems were over when I left the next day, having sprayed the entire hole and surrounding area on the couch with Bitter Apple. I was wrong again; not only was the hole now the size of a dinner plate, but also Bijoux seemed to enjoy the Bitter Apple taste! I was at my wit’s end and struggled to think of another solution. I tried pepper. I tried chili powder. With all of the spices I was sprinkling on it, our couch must have been the best tasting couch ever, and nothing stopped her. (It didn't occur to me at the time that she was not touching the surface with her mouth--only her paws--but I didn't have an alternate plan.) Eventually I would stack about twenty pounds of books on top of the hole before I left each morning, and Bijoux lost interest. When we bought a new couch six months later, it never became an issue again. It was an expensive lesson for all of us.

Two's Company, Three's a Crowd

2007-11-08T06:17:00.002-06:00

Lesson Number Three: Don’t Start Something You Don’t Want To Finish, part 1

Jim’s frequent Navy cruises to Cuba, the Mediterranean, the Virgin Islands, and other points unknown were a big factor in our decision to bring a dog into the house. Although nothing could have replaced Jim’s presence, Bijoux filled a little lonely space in me and gave me something to concentrate on and take care of in Jim’s absence. When we brought her crate up to the bedroom, it was with the understanding that the floor was the closest she would get to us in the middle of the night. That was until Jim went away for the first time after Bijoux was reasonably housebroken. She no longer had to be in the crate when we were gone during the day--she had proven herself trustworthy to have the run of the house. It was only at night that we wanted to make sure she didn’t roam.

I put her in the crate, just like I had done every night since she had been with us. I got under my own covers and looked at her. She sat at the wire door, cocking her head to the right side, and then to the left. I told her to lie down. I told her to go to sleep. I tried to roll over and ignore her, but it just wasn’t working for me. Each time I turned in her direction to see if she was laying down, she would wag her tail and whine, and those puppy dog eyes would plead with me to let her out.

Those eyes! It was not the first time they would get the best of me, and it certainly wasn’t the last, but I remember this night like it was yesterday. I gingerly opened the door, pushing aside my inner voice that was trying to stop this from happening. Bijoux tentatively came out of her crate, looking at me like the sucker I was. Remembering the passage from Superpuppy about how dogs typically don’t urinate where they sleep, I reassured myself that she would be fine in our bed. Although it took her a while to settle down from the excitement of the battle she had won, she finally plopped down next to me and fell into a deep sleep until morning. (I, however, slept poorly.) This was the first night of the next thirteen-plus years that she would share our bed.

Click here for part 2!

Thoughtful Husband, Great Gift!

2007-11-07T04:51:00.000-06:00

I had to share the birthday gift my husband gave me yesterday. SO COOL:

Yes, he framed my book. Took me totally by surprise. I love the way it's framed, and I love the frame itself. It's one of the most beautiful frames I've ever seen...and I've seen lots of them, as I did custom framing for about six years way back in the day! He was adorable as he told me he framed it in mind for our family room wall, and talked about how he wanted to frame ALL of my books and hang them there. (I only have one more planned...but you never know, right?) It was a great surprise, and not the first time he has framed something special. This is what he got for me for our 20th anniversary last December:

At the risk of sounding like Chandler from "Friends", Could he BE any more creative?

(Go to 1:40)

Normally I'm the creative one. I'm a great gift-giver, and proud of it. But he has totally outdone me twice now. What will I do for HIS birthday in January? Ugh, I'd better start thinking about it now.

In Honor of My Birthday...

2007-11-06T07:40:00.000-06:00

I'm only putting up an official post on *one* of my blogs today:

Suburban Scrawl

More book news tomorrow!

Need To Stock Up?

2007-11-04T17:57:00.000-06:00

I just noticed at the Amazon site for Remembering Ruby that it is currently included in the "4 For 3" promotion. That means that if you buy four items that are eligible, you'll get the least expensive one for free.

I know nothing about this promotion as far as how long it is going to go on, but more details are at the Amazon site.

So, if you want to stock up for gifts, get four books! Otherwise, if you only want one, find three other items included in the promotion and you can save money that way, too!

West Suburban Ink!

2007-11-02T18:15:00.000-05:00

What a great day it's been, bookwise!

First, a client at the salon--after drying her nails at the drying table (of course! she wouldn't dry them at the polishing table, would she?) where my book is conveniently on display--approached me at the desk and congratulated me on my book. I said, "Thanks!" She asked, "You wouldn't happen to have any with you so I could buy one, would you?"

And I said, "Lady, are you kidding?" and then I opened up my trenchcoat where I had sewn about six copies into the lining as if they were watches.

Just kidding. Just trying to add a little bit of spice to that story.

The truth is less exciting: I just ran out to my car to grab a book. She asked me to sign it for her sister, which I did, and she said, "I'm going to give it to my sister because she's a grief counselor."

YAY! YIPPEE! WOO HOO!

There I go with those mixed emotions again. Should I really have been mentally cheering about a grief counselor? It's such a serious (and might I add VERY IMPORTANT) job. I guess what I was really cheering about was the potential for more people to hear about my book. As she was walking out I grabbed some of my business cards and asked her to ask her sis to pass them on.

THEN the really, really thrilling part of the day arrived. Another client came over to me about an hour later on her way out, and said "I saw the little blurb about your book in West Suburban Living magazine, congratulations!!"

I screamed "WHAT? Shut up! Are you kidding me???"

She said, "They didn't tell you it was going to be in there?"

I had sent them a book for review (along with my press release) for their "Local Authors" page but didn't think of checking the new issue because I didn't anticipate such a quick inclusion.

I asked her if the blurb included the cover graphic, and she said she didn't remember seeing it. I was really hoping so, because I believe that Julie's awesomely designed cover is what would draw people to the blurb first.

Needless to say, I was quite anxious to leave work and go get a copy of the magazine, so as soon as I was able, I hopped into the car and rushed over to Borders. I frantically glanced around the magazine racks and finally saw it, grabbed it, and madly flipped the pages.

And there it was.
On page 42.
With the cover graphic.
A joyful moment!

This magazine gets distributed to almost 27,000 households each month!

I called Julie right away and we shrieked together on the phone.

I love today.

She Had My Back, Always

2007-11-02T07:28:00.001-05:00

Lesson Number Two, The Buddy System Always Works, Part Three:

As most “Dog People” would agree, the idea of constant companionship is something that both canine and master can easily embrace, especially if they feel like they’ve waited a lifetime to be together in the first place. As we grew accustomed to being together for most of the day, it was not long at all before she insisted on nighttime togetherness, as well (or maybe it was me…who knows?). We started out leaving Bijoux’s crate in the kitchen, and that’s where she would sleep at night. From the kitchen, we moved her to the living room, thinking it would be warmer there (as if there was ever a chill problem in our Norfolk, Virginia townhouse!). As the days went on and her nighttime whining continued, I reasoned that she might be comforted being in our room with us. That’s how the crate made its way upstairs to our bedroom. And my first brush with Lesson Number Three—Don’t Start Something You Don’t Want To Finish—was about to take place.

Bijoux was my first “baby”, and as Jim and I spent hours with her whenever we could, she got used to the attention. Eventually she took to following me everywhere, even if I was just getting up to turn on the television. No sooner would my bottom rise up from the couch, she would be up on all fours, ready to accompany me anywhere. Jim just shook his head, telling her, “She’s just going to get a drink, Bijoux…relax!” If I was on my way to the kitchen, she trotted behind me happily, wagging her tail in hopes that I would share my snack with her. If I went upstairs to change my clothes, she hopped up on the bed, lay down, and got comfortable until I was finished and ready to leave the room. When I did, she jumped off the bed and followed me back downstairs.

Even when I just went to use the bathroom and closed the door but didn’t let the lock catch, it was only a matter of seconds before I heard a thump as her nose hit the door to push it open. She peeked her head in only for a moment as if to say, “Are you in here? Okay.” After she was sure of my whereabouts, she backed up and went to lay down wherever she could, all the while keeping the bathroom doorway in her line of sight.

The need Bijoux had to be always by my side even caused leash problems. She gladly trotted beside me when I held the leash. She gladly trotted beside Jim or the kids when they held the leash if I walked with them. The problems began if we were all walking together and I had to leave. Bijoux whined and pulled at the leash, trying to follow me. One day I took her with me to pick Dylan and Jason up at school. Needing to talk to one of the teachers, I gave the leash to Dylan and told him to take Bijoux home because I’d be more than a minute. When I turned around a couple of minutes later, he was still there, struggling to make her turn around and go home with him, all the while her eyes were locked on me and her four feet were planted firmly where she stood. She wasn’t going anywhere without me.

At night, she jumped into bed with me and made herself right at home. Typically, Jim was still brushing his teeth when Bijoux and I snuggled in. We had a little game that we played, a game that never got old. To us. To Jim? He found it funny only once or twice. When Bijoux hopped up onto the bed, she laid down on Jim’s side of the bed, even placing her head on the pillow. I covered her up to her neck and there we stayed, just waiting for Jim to come into the room. As he appeared in the room, Bijoux kept her body completely still—except for her eyes. Her eyes followed him around the room as he put his pajamas on, checked his closet for tomorrow’s clothes, and generally finished up for the evening. Jim made eye contact with her as he walked around to his side of the bed and stood next to her waiting for her to move. And she waited for him to leave! She didn’t move a muscle until he said, “Move your ass, Bijoux!” If she was being particularly stubborn, he also gave her a little whack on the bottom. She clumsily got up and lumbered around the bed like a big ox, finally plopping down next to me, her body curled up against mine. As the night went on, she tunneled under the covers and usually ended up in a big ball, right between my knees. Worse, if it was summer, she ended up in a big ball on the outside of the covers, right between my knees. Jim thought I was crazy for not kicking her out, and I spent many nights sleeping badly because of her, but for some reason I didn’t care enough to make her leave.

Although she followed me so closely (especially in the kitchen) that I tripped over her on a constant basis, her perpetual presence was one of the hardest things to get over after her death. Sometimes I still feel like she’s right behind me and I turn around, expecting to see her there.

She's a Maniac, Maniac...(sing it!)

2007-11-01T06:43:00.002-05:00

Lesson Number Two, The Buddy System Always Works, Part 2

Bijoux was a frequent visitor at the craft store where I worked part-time. The first time I brought her in, holding her in my arms, my co-workers fell in love immediately. (She had that effect on people.) After a couple of weeks I even got permission from the manager to actually put her down on the floor to walk around for a few minutes, but only before the store was open.

It became a ritual to bring Bijoux each time I picked up my paycheck. We would arrive at the store at fifteen minutes before opening time and knock on the glass to gain entry. Once we were inside, I unfastened her leash and, as my co-workers laughed in anticipation, I acted like I was going to scoop her up into my arms. Bijoux took off then, like a maniac, running down the center aisle and stopping just short of the end, skidding around corners. Many times her oversized paws couldn’t stop her soon enough, and she’d end up flopping to the ground and rolling around as she tried quickly to switch directions. She and I ran the aisles for ten minutes at a time, and then, having had enough fun for the time being, left for home.

Click here for part 3!

Just a Few Kibbles and Bits This Morning

2007-11-01T06:18:00.000-05:00

Some updates on book progress today, but not much is happenning:

1. To answer my most-asked question of late: No, I have not heard from Ellen or Ross. I may never hear from Ellen or Ross, or it may just take forever. For a girl who likes closure and may never get it in many book situations, this is a "great" experience for me. Keep on keeping your fingers crossed!

2. I have completed the process of sending out all of my review copies, and now I'm waiting for some of those to come in. Another situation where I could possibly wait forever...but I have faith that a few will come through with a review. Don't worry, I'll post them here!

3. I finally finished making those pet boutique phone calls. I did have the few who want another call in a couple of weeks, but that's great: at least they'll expect to hear from me!

4. I received my second book shipment this week! That was exciting, because I am almost finished selling the large first shipment. I plan to take the new books to an event we're having at the salon in mid-November for my mini-book signing!

5. You have today and tomorrow to go to Manic Mommy's blog and post a comment about your dog's name if you want to be in the running to win a free copy of Remembering Ruby! Her blog is hopping, so get over there and read and enter!

6. Holla! to Kevin at the Wag N' Wash. I stopped in to hang some flyers and business cards in his store and he was very, very nice. He has a great store, too!

7. I feel like I'm trying to get the word out about the book through one or two people at a time (well, I am, right?). I thought yesterday about trying to find some event where I could set up a table with my books, like a craft show but not a craft show. Any general ideas of what I should look for? And do you think it would be worth it? Instead of marketing to one or two at a time, I could reach--what--75 to 100 at a time that day? Advice, please??

8. My next steps include mailing out more information to the second round of rescues, and I have yet to market to veterinary offices, which I really need to do soon. I hope to start that this weekend!

Blind Blogger Date

2007-10-30T16:11:00.000-05:00

I had the exciting chance to meet a real, live blogger in person today! The blogger in question? None other than Manic Mommy! I started to read her blog pretty regularly several weeks ago, and when she checked out my blog we discovered that she lives in the next suburb over! She is a writer who has an agent, and I am a writer who has questions about having agents...and I am a writer who has been through the publishing process and am working on marketing, and she has lots of of questions about that, so we decided to meet!

WARNING: Obviously all of you out there know that arranging to meet someone that you have discovered on the internet could be dangerous. If you do this, meet them only in public, and make sure your loved ones know where you're going and when you'll be back.

Okay, back to the story. Manic and I decided to meet in a place about halfway between our homes: yes, in public. A killing the day before Halloween wouldn't be a good thing, although we joked about it.

I was so excited to meet her, because her blog is hilarious. She and I e-mailed back and forth a few times and I made a list of things I wanted to make sure to tell her so that she could store it in her brain for future use (when she publishes her book).

When we met at high noon, we laughed when we realized we were both wearing black shirts and jeans: can't go wrong with that! And then I ordered a water and a Diet Coke and she said "ME TOO!"

We had a great lunch and got along famously; it was really fun to interview each other about projects that we have going on, and we also talked about our kids a little bit and working out, since I'm an instructor and she's a student. She is afraid to try spinning (she prefers yoga), but I may just get her to come to my class once to see how she likes it.

She made a point of telling me not to take it personally when she says she's not really a dog person, and I already knew that, because of this. I don't have to have only "dog person" friends. LOL

It's such a small world that it turns out her daughter plays with the daughter of someone I knew from my health club about 10 years ago! Crazy!

After lunch, we walked to the bookstore and we looked at some of the children's books and chatted some more. We decided to give away one of my books...so if you're interested in entering the little contest we've concocted, visit her blog! (You've got 'til Friday!)

All in all, a great lunch with absolutely no violence. And I think I've got a new friend, which is the best part!

Thanks, Thanks, Thanks!

2007-10-29T13:37:00.000-05:00

Many thanks to the Beagles of Arizona Rescue Club (BARC: isn't that cool???) in Surprise, Arizona for putting my information on their "links" page.

If you'll look over there to the right, you'll see a listing of Beagle Rescues that I have been had a conversation or two with, regarding the book. Please check them out if you live in their area (or know someone who does), and rescue a beagle!

I'll Take "Best-Selling" Any Way I Can Get It

2007-10-29T10:39:00.000-05:00

Upon googling the book with my name (and using the Yahoo! search engine), I discovered a couple of things. Number one, my book is being sold at tons of online places I have never even heard of.

Number two, and more exciting, is that my book is listed under "Hot New Releases" on Amazon, and it's #2 in the best-selling new and future releases under the pet death category. (That's a mouthful!) The number 1? A new book about the Berenstain Bears. Good for them! I am plenty happy with being in second place. Like the other Amazon rankings, this one is updated hourly, but I don't care. I'll take whatever good stuff I can get, even if I'm off the chart this afternoon!

Like You Need One More Blog To Read, Right???

2007-10-28T12:01:00.000-05:00

I've gone and done it. I've begun another blog. I couldn't help myself, as I have way too much to say...but can't say it all here because the purpose of this blog is definitely to promote my book and share doggie stories with others.

I can't count the number of times I come across something during my day and think, "Wow, that would be a great blog entry!" Alas, I wasn't able to post about it here. So please, as if you're not busy enough, bookmark my other blog and check in there on a regular basis as well. It might be fun!

Outage

2007-10-27T09:59:00.000-05:00

Argggghhh! On Thursday while driving home from work and attempting to call home, I discovered that we had no phone service. Ouch! Well, I thought, at least we have cell phones and the call forwarding feature on our home line...

What I wasn't prepared for was the fact that our internet service runs through the phone line...double ouch!

"This can't happen," I thought. "I have WORK to do!"

But alas, it did happen, and I tried to learn yet another lesson in patience. Our line was repaired yesterday afternoon and I can now obviously spend time online working, e-mailing friends, and reading the blogs I have become attached to...and the whole experience makes me wonder how much harder all of this book stuff would have been without the technology that is available today, so I take a moment to be thankful.

Constant Companion

2007-10-25T08:00:00.002-05:00

Lesson Number Two: The Buddy System Always Works, part 1

Bijoux became my almost-constant companion. Barring work and school, which were blocks of time completely incompatible with having a puppy partner, she went everywhere with me. I took her in the car as much as possible, not only to keep me company but also to get her used to car travel. A quick trip to the bank? Bijoux learned in a matter of two or three visits that the bank stocked dog treats for canine customers. An afternoon at a friend’s house? Bijoux made her own friends while we were there! A grocery run for some last-minute dinner ingredients? Bijoux was along for the ride then, too, and loved every minute of it. When the boys were born, life got too hectic to bring Bijoux along on car rides as much as she was accustomed. Whenever a new opportunity for an easy errand with her presented itself, I was quick to take advantage of it, especially on cool and breezy spring or fall days.

I cracked open the windows and left Bijoux in the car, saying “See you later, Alligator!” (BLOGNOTE: I ONLY left her in the car alone for a few minutes at a time, and NEVER on a hot day.) Very early on, she developed a habit of moving into the driver’s seat when I left her in the car. I always tried to park the car facing the building I was visiting. The very second I climbed out of the car and walked away, she got up from the passenger seat and climbed into the driver’s seat, keeping her eye on the door of the building I entered. There she sat, straight and tall, staring in my direction—I know this because occasionally I was in a position to see her from inside—just waiting for me to reappear.

As I made my way back to the car, Bijoux always spotted me immediately. Although she remained seated while I was still yards away from the car, I could see her peering over the steering wheel with her ears perked up, wagging her tail as soon as I came into view. Her whole upper body moved back and forth ever so slightly as she wagged her tail, celebrating my return. It was only when I opened the car door to get in that she got up and hopped back over to the shotgun seat and settled herself, ready to ride on.

Click here for part 2!

Name Game

2007-10-24T08:52:00.001-05:00

Prologue: How She Came To Us

We had already decided that we weren’t going to get a dog. In the late 1980’s, Jim was in the Navy, stationed in Norfolk, Virginia. He seemed to be on deployment constantly. I really wanted to discuss having a dog for a pet. Having grown up in a three-Dachshund home, I had developed and intense love for dogs. I was, as they say, a “Dog Person”. What I longed for now was a puppy companion.

Jim wasn’t much for that “touchy-feely” dog thing: he was in favor of the useful reasons for having a dog. He thought that having a dog in the home might provide me with a sense of security…but that was the practical argument. I agreed with him, figuring that even if we had different reasons for wanting a dog, this would all work out to satisfy us both.

We had many discussions about the exact kind of dog we wanted. We weren’t too picky…"all" I wanted was a female, purebred Beagle—one that wasn’t from a pet store, and didn’t cost an arm and a leg. All Jim wanted was a dog that wasn’t too big, wasn’t too small, and didn’t cost an arm and a leg. He was fine with a Beagle. And, with that decision made, we were on our way!

I began keeping an eye on the classified ads. I purchased and studied a book on raising a puppy: Superpuppy, by Daniel Manus Pinkwater and Jill Pinkwater. (BLOGNOTE: This is an EXCELLENT book for new dog owners. I highly recommend it!!) I had many discussions with friends—poor things—about our future dog. I even borrowed a “Dog Naming Book” from the library (BLOGNOTE: A bit obsessive, you are wondering??). I pored through the book as if I were studying for an exam. There were names of all kinds, in many languages, in this book…but none of them fit the image I had of “our dog”. Suddenly a name stood out from the page: Bijoux, from the French, meaning, “little jewels”. (BLOGNOTE: If you've already read "Lesson #1, you might recall that, upon meeting Bijoux for the first time, I noticed her jewel-like markings on her head. And that was AFTER I decided on a name. Check out the photo to the right...) The name had a ring of familiarity about it, too. We remembered that Bijou (no "X") was the name of the dog that belonged to the title character in John Ritter’s television show, “Hooperman”, and we had botched the answer once while playing Trivial Pursuit. I took it as some kind of sign: the first of many. We loved it.

But—for a day—it was not to be. On a day in early April of 1990, we eventually came to the conclusion that financially, we wouldn’t be able to afford it. In financial terms, having a pet is similar to owning a car: once you make the purchase, there are regular, sometimes large and unpredictable, expenses that come along with the responsibility and commitment. This decision was a disappointment to both of us, but we knew that eventually we would realize my dream of dog ownership.

Little did we know it would be the very next day! A friend phoned me late in the afternoon. “Did you see the classifieds?” she said. “No,” I said, “We decided not to get a dog right now.” “Look in the classifieds,” she urged.

I casually flipped through the newspaper until I reached the animal ads. I couldn’t believe my eyes: the perfect little ad that seemed too good to be true was right there in front of me: “BEAGLE puppy, AKC, female. $50. Last one.” I immediately picked up the telephone and dialed the number. The puppy was born on an actual farm in Chesapeake, the mother was on the premises, and yes, the puppy was still available. Believing that perhaps fate was intervening, I excitedly made an appointment to meet this ten-week-old puppy later that evening. Jim was skeptical, but I convinced him that maybe this was a sign that we shouldn’t ignore.

That was over thirteen years ago. Listening to that instinct was one of the best things we have ever done.

So, that's my prologue! As far as "Ruby" is concerned, I struggled for a while in coming up with a name for the book. I felt strongly that "Bijoux" (BEE-shooo) would be, in a book, a name that most young kids would have trouble reading. For a while I considered making the book about a Buddy or a Susie (which, as you'll find out later, is what I called Bijoux quite often), but Buddy is a boy's name and the photos would have been goofy (!), and Susie is too much of a human name to me.

One day, the name "Ruby" popped into my head (maybe Bijoux put it there!). Did you put it all together yet? Ruby is a little jewel. Just like Bijoux.

Discombobulated Is My Middle Name...

2007-10-23T17:33:00.000-05:00

And that will be obvious as you read this poorly assembled post. So much to do, so little time. I have several things to post about today, and I don't know where to begin.

Reviews: The book now has two reviews on Amazon! Very thrilling. All good reviews will obviously help me a bit with the marketing because the book will gain some credibility. Have you purchased the book? If you did, and if you liked it (what's not to like? LOL), please please please take a couple of minutes and review it for me on Amazon. Just a couple of simple sentences about what you like about the book will do, and I would really appreciate it!

Post Office Update: I just visited my new friend M at the post office today. I was sending out more review copies, and she called my number, so I went to her window. I asked her if her supervisor told her that I called, and she said yes, and thanks. She then proceeded to tell me how upset she had been when she looked into those blasted guidelines after I left and discovered her mistake; she didn't want the guy at the other branch to have a bad reputation when she was wrong all along. She said she called me ON HER DAY OFF, but that I had to know the real story behind these guidelines. She was very cute about it, but actually a little hard on herself, in my opinion. I'd much rather have that, though, instead of someone who could care less. I told her it was all good in the 'hood, and that now we ALL know the guidelines.

NaBloPoMo: I was so irritated yesterday because I tried to type up an initial post, and it was going really great until I tried to attach a link. Then: POOF! It was gone. WAH. So now I have to start it all over again...but at that point, I had to walk away from the computer! By the way, I created two blog groups on NaBloPoMo: All About Pets and Beagle Bloggers. I also joined the Chicago Bloggers group. Anyone out there want to join me?

Progress made today: I sent out (as I mentioned above) 4 more review copies. Julie has thrown a bunch of great ideas my way for marketing, and one of them that I love is the website petsugar.com. I've read popsugar.com, but there are lots of others (if you go to petsugar, scroll down to the bottom and you'll find the listing of all their other "Sugar" sites). Julie told me that petsugar is a relatively new "branch", so I sent them a copy of the book. I also sent a copy to a magazine called Modern Dog. I saw it in the bookstore yesterday and it looks like a great magazine. It comes from our friends to the north--no, not Wisconsin--Canada! What I loved was, when I called the toll free number to ask who I should address my book to, the woman who answered the phone was VERY friendly. I am on a roll with great customer service!

I have begun making follow-up phone calls to the pet boutiques who received my letters. I don't enjoy the phone calls, I must say. I would much rather get in my car and visit everybody but, besides it being very unprofessional to pop in without making a phone call first, the vast area I would have to cover would make it a huge waste of time, energy, and gasoline. So making phone calls it is! I had a couple of positive exchanges during today's calls; a couple of store owners want to see the book. One shop doesn't stock books but the owner said he has a "community board" that I am welcome to post on, so that's a good thing. Moving right along!

Beagle Rescues: I am starting to hear from the Beagle Rescues that I sent information to; they seem really excited about the book and I am hoping that they will be a major part of my marketing. More to come on that as it happens!

Bijoux's name: It occurred to me that after I started posting my essays about Bijoux/the real Ruby, I totally skipped over the introduction that I wrote! Well, I won't post the whole thing out of order now but I will post about how Bijoux got her name, because that information is important in the path leading to Ruby. Stay tuned for that.

Identify yourself, please: I am starting to get "hits" from all over the world, which is really exciting for me. Please feel free to leave a comment and introduce yourself. You don't have to have a google account to put a comment up; you can post under "anonymous" if you want. I'd love to hear from you!

To my friends in the Land Down Under: I asked M at the post office to weigh a book package and tell me how much it would be to get it to you, and the postage is $5. So if any of you all the way down there would like to order one directly from me, e-mail me using the link over to the right and we'll get that set up.

I think that's it for now. Isn't that enough? My goodness! I'm exhausted just typing about it! Have a great evening...more tomorrow!

NaBloPoMo

2007-10-23T06:20:00.000-05:00

I just signed up to participate in National Blog Posting Month, which is November. "All I have to do" is post everyday during the month. I will be posting both here and on the NaBloPoMo site on a seperate blog, which should be fun. I'm using the blog on that site to post about my *current* dog Roxie, because she is just hilarious and I can't post too much about her on this blog, because it's all about the book.

Of course, after I signed up I remembered that Jim and I are going away for 5 days mid-month. How am I going to manage that one? Hmm. I may have to write some short posts early and ask Julie to throw them up. (Not literally: gross!)

If you're interested in joining NaBloPoMo, click on the link I just installed at the bottom, right-hand side of this page. And add me to your friends list! On NaBloPoMo my user name is Remembering Ruby. Creative, huh? (Workin' it...workin' it!)

If you are a NaBloPoMo member and stopped in to check this blog out, welcome! Please leave a comment and identify yourself...I'd love to meet you!

Where Else Can You Find A Blog With Three Consecutive Entries About the U.S. Postal Service?

2007-10-22T15:01:00.000-05:00

This morning I tried to call the Post Office to sing the praises of M, the super-dee-duper Window Clerk (Is that an official title? I'll have to look that up) who far surpassed her normal job requirements when dealing with me this weekend.

Unfortunately, after asking me for my address (I assume there are different supervisors for different parts of town? That's an interesting concept. If you misbehave on the job, do you get "demoted" to the more whiny areas?) and going to find the correct supervisor, she left me on hold for a really long time--for this type of call, anyway. I ended up having to hang up because I was on my way out to meet my friend D for lunch. I did not let this apparent indifference about leaving customers on hold for an indefinite amount of time deter me from wanting to call back.

Upon my return from lunch, I called again. This time the operator asked me what my call was regarding, and she didn't need my address because she was putting me directly through to the Window Supervisor. The woman answered and when I told her that I was calling to give "Big Ups" to one of the clerks (I didn't say "Big Ups"; I just like that term better for the story--it adds flavor!), she seemed flabbergasted. It's clear that she doesn't get many calls like mine.

I tried to make the long story short for her (it's tough: I challenge YOU to try it!) and in the middle of it she asked me, "Well, did she offer you Express Mail so it could get there faster?" She obviously was missing my point, so I had to back up a bit and recap my recap. I finally got it all out and she thanked me and told me she would let M know that I called. I hope she really does. I hate it when management gets feedback (especially good feedback!) and then suddenly get too lazy to pass it on to the people who need to hear it.

In other post office news (will it ever stop?? LOL), the book that I sent (Priority Mail, remember?) to Ross the Intern at the Tonight Show got delivered to the studio around 7:30 this morning. I wonder when he'll actually have it in hand.

Things are percolating now...Send good karma my way, please!

Who Knew The U.S. Post Office Had Such Amazing Customer Service???

2007-10-21T16:22:00.000-05:00

I have another chapter of the "Ellen book and the Post Office" saga for you today!

In keeping an eye on my Delivery Confirmation number, I found out (Friday night) that the book that I sent to "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" was indeed delivered on Friday morning at 11:22! Whee! So that was a relief, that I wouldn't have to expect it back in my mailbox in a matter of a week or two...

And then yesterday (Saturday), I left the house to run some errands and discovered that I had a voice mail message when I turned on my cell phone. To my surprise, it was the Post Office lady! Say it with me, people: "Whaaaaaa???"

Here is her message, word for word:
"Hi Melisa, it's M from the post office. That book going to Ellen's show should be fine because back in May they made some changes and now they're saying that if it's rigid you can do Delivery Confirmation First Class and it doesn't have to be 3/4 of an inch thick; they added some stuff in there and I was wrong, so I'm sorry. I just wanted to tell you that, that piece should be fine. Thanks, bye."

If I had been standing up at the time I listened to it, you could have knocked me over with a feather.

But wait! How did she get my number, you're wondering?

During my time at her window, she was dazzled by the labels on the envelopes and asked about them. I told her about the book and she seemed interested, so I gave her my business card! (Workin' it, workin' it!) Turns out it's a good thing I did that; she probably was up all night thinking about this situation and how she thought I was totally freaked out; it's great for both of us that she was able to make that call! Now I know just how great some post office employees are. I plan to call her branch manager tomorrow to give her a big "Holla!" Management needs to know these things, you know?

Could a "Comedy of Errors" Get This Book on the Ellen Show????

2007-10-19T14:41:00.001-05:00

So...I wasn't going to actually blog about sending the book to the Ellen DeGeneres Show unless I was successful in getting it some airtime, but the events of this week are just too bizarre to keep the details in my own house.

I decided long ago that the first book I would send out as part of my marketing plan would be to Ellen, for several reasons:

1. I'm a big fan, of course. I have been following her (not literally!) since she played Margo Van Meter on the "Duet" spinoff called "Open House" on Fox.

2. I know how much she loves animals.

3. I know that she will often, at the beginning of the show, give some airtime to unusual things, like the "Cheers To You!" CD...which I bought--AND LOVED--after I saw it on her show.

Good reasons, right?

When my three author copies arrived a couple of weeks ago, I set one aside to send to the show. I worked on my letter and packaged it all up to take to the post office, and did so first thing Tuesday morning.

Do any of you remember what happenned on Tuesday's Ellen show?

Hmm. Yikes. Did any of you out there who have been following this story catch what Ellen's hairdresser's daughter's name is? Click "play", below. It's in the first 10 seconds.

Uh huh. Mind-blowing, isn't it?
Picture this scenario in your mind:
You're a staffer at the Ellen DeGeneres show and you receive an ADORABLE little grey envelope that has a colorful little label. Upon taking a closer look, you see that the label depicts--is that a DOG COLLAR?? Oh, and the collar has a little red heart tag on it! What does the tag say?

"Remembering RUBY"? What is this, some kind of joke?

No, it's not...I ASSURE you it's not. And now, I present to you An Open Letter to the Ellen DeGeneres Show:

Dear Ellen and Staff,
Hello. I did not mean to have what I think is probably the worst timing in my entire life when I sent you my new book, called "Remembering Ruby". I am not insensitive; I am well aware of what is going on with Ellen, Portia, Ruby, Mutts & Moms, and most of all, Iggy. My Ruby had her name months before America ever heard of your Ruby. If I had just waited until Tuesday after 4:00 to go to the post office; I would have watched the show and decided to wait a couple of weeks before sending it. Obviously I cannot go back in time but I do hope that you will take pity on me for apparently living in the Twilight Zone. I would really appreciate it.
Love,
Your Fan,
Melisa

Figuring there was no reason to obsess about it (as I am prone to do, about EVERYTHING), I went on with my week, keeping an eye on the story as it is just unbelievable to me what a fiasco this turned into. I really wish that Iggy could be back with Ruby and her family.

Anyway, I spent several hours this morning finishing up some letters and packaging up books to send out for reviews:

It seems like, with all the time I spent on it, the stack should be about triple that size, but whatever...on to the rest of the story.

One of the books is going to Ross the intern on The Tonight Show. Why? He loves animals, especially dogs. Check out his blog to see many videos of him and his dog Louise. It's hysterical. Upon arriving at the post office (a different branch from the one I visited on Tuesday), I put the Ross envelope on the counter and asked for delivery confirmation with First Class Postage. The postal worker, a woman who is very, very nice but also reminds me of Cliff Clavin from "Cheers", informed me that I had to send it Priority Mail in order to get the Delivery Confirmation. I said, "Wha?? I just sent one from the other branch on Tuesday, and I was able to do that."

Sidenote: I wasn't protesting having to pay extra for Priority Mail; I was just flabbergasted that this postal guideline was something apparently taught on the day in Post Office School when the other guy from Tuesday was sick or something. My Ellen book was now in Jeopardy!

She said, "No, you couldn't have done that. The parcel has to be more than 3/4" thick in order to do that. They know the guidelines."

Lucky for me I rarely clean out my purse so I had the receipt handy. I showed it to her and she said, "Huh. Well, what do you know? He shouldn't have done that. It will arrive there 'Postage Due'."

IT WILL ARRIVE THERE "POSTAGE DUE?"

Could there be any more embarrassment associated with getting this book to Ellen? Maybe the pages in that particular copy are blank? Maybe the mailman dropped it in the mud on the way there? Maybe my letter is full of typos???

She went on to ask her co-worker for confirmation on what she was telling me, and she got the head nod from that lady. She was very apologetic to me as if this mistake by someone in another branch reflected on her as well. I appreciated the sentiment greatly but told her it wasn't necessary. I said, "I checked the delivery confirmation on that book this morning and it said it had arrived at the Santa Clarita, California post office and left for delivery...does that mean anything?"

She said, "Oh! That's good news! That means you have about a 50/50 chance of it getting delivered as is. It just depends on if the carrier notices the shortage."

After sending Ross' book with the Priority Mail rate and sending the rest of them First Class (without Delivery Confirmation, of course), I left the post office, reeling. (Okay, that was dramatic. Sorry.) Three outcomes are possible:
1. The book will be delivered.
2. The book will be delivered after an Ellen staffer pays the extra postage.
3. The Ellen staff will refuse delivery and the book will be returned to me, at which time I will return to the post office with my receipt (since I have no purse-cleaning plans for the next week or two) and ask them to fix it.

And now, I present to you, An Open Letter to the Ellen DeGeneres Show, Part Two:
Dear Ellen and staff,
It's me, the girl with bad timing and apparently a useless/forgetful/sleepy post office staff. If you received my book with no incident, then I say to you "Halleluyah!" If my book came to you with some postage due and you paid for it, then I am almost as overjoyed as I was when I gave birth to my sons. (almost) I apologize deeply for the error; I know it may seem to you--since you don't know me--as if I tend to blame everyone else for my mistakes, but I assure you that is not true. When I make an honest mistake I am very good at claiming responsibility and making amends. That said, although I did not make the error in computing the postage, I will absolutely refund you what you paid PLUS, let's say, an extra $5 for your trouble. Best wishes to you and your families, and I hope to hear from you soon.
Love,
Your Fan,
Melisa

After all of this, I'm going to hope that fate will get my book on air. This has just been too weird! But I need all of the luck I can get with this one...keep your fingers crossed for me! I'll keep you posted!

Making a Powerful First Impression...

2007-10-18T10:12:00.001-05:00

Lesson Number 1: There Is Such a Thing As Love At First Sight (part 2)

We gave the farmer fifty dollars and eagerly took the puppy out to our pick-up truck. As Jim drove, I held her up on my shoulder so she could look out of the window behind us at her birthplace. I playfully took her paw and waved behind us. As we drove away from the house on the long dirt road, her mother—the largest Beagle I had ever seen—chased us for a bit, barking as the last of her babies made her way to a new life.

As prepared as we had been mentally to take on a puppy, our house was definitely not so. We had none of the things that new puppy owners should have: no puppy food, no water dish, no bed, no leash, no collar, and certainly no toys. We also had no plan for the next day, when Jim returned to work and I returned to my full day of college courses. Although we had been thinking about a puppy for a long time, this was still an impulse. We had to jump into action right away.

The first errand that needed to be run was for puppy food and other necessities. Jim decided to stay home with Bijoux while I took a list of needed items to the grocery store. When I returned home, we fed her and played with her—with the new toys I bought, along with a pair of socks that Jim knotted—until she was exhausted. We also managed to use almost two rolls of film, taking as many photographs of our new addition in one evening as new parents would of their newborn.

In our many “pre-puppy” discussions, Jim and I were both insistent that when we brought a puppy into our home, we would housebreak her with the crate method, rather than just barricading her into the kitchen. As luck would have it, we had good friends—Dawn and Scott—whose English Springer Spaniel had recently outgrown his puppy crate. In the morning, I tried calling Dawn, but she was not home. Her answering machine picked up. “Bijoux is here!” I excitedly breathed into the phone. “Could we borrow the crate that you used for Rex? Let me know!”

It was almost time to leave for work and school, and since we didn’t have a puppy crate in our possession, the only choice for the day was to put a baby gate up in the kitchen doorway. For one day, we thought, it’s no big deal.

Upon arriving home from school a few hours later, however, I anxiously unlocked the front door and discovered that it was a big deal. The house looked like a truck had driven through it. Newspapers and school papers were strewn everywhere. Formerly clean laundry was scattered all over the floor. The place was a chaotic mess. Suddenly after hearing my entrance, Bijoux, whipped into a frenzy, skidded around the corner to greet me. I took her outside to take care of her business immediately and then went back in to survey the rest of the damage. As I looked through the clutter, I began to discover that although she had made a huge mess, nothing was ripped, chewed, torn, or otherwise. She had just pulled things down from tables…not damaged them. I was quite impressed and pleased. Still in the living room, I wondered how she was able to knock the gate down when I had double-checked its security.

As I approached the kitchen, I couldn’t believe my eyes. There was the baby gate, still snugly in place where I had left it that morning. Somehow she had conquered the height of it on her first day trying! We would never find out whether she jumped or climbed her way to freedom, but this very early event in our life together gave us a strong indication of the spirit for which Bijoux would become known.

My Ship(ment) Has Finally Come In!

2007-10-17T10:06:00.000-05:00

Last night at about 8:00 p.m. the doorbell rang. It was the second time it rang within 30 minutes, and very weird because NOBODY ever comes to our house after dark unless we're expecting them. The first visitor was someone from the Boy Scout Troop, but that's another story.

Anyway, at 8:00 p.m. when the bell rang, the dog went crazy barking as usual, and Jim and I looked at each other as if to say, "Whaaa?"

I went to see who it was and, through the window, saw the UPS truck pulling away. Hurray! What can Brown do for me? It can bring me books!

Now the pressure's on. Thank goodness I don't work tomorrow and Friday; I'm going to have to get all of my review copies in the mail!

It's an exciting day!

The Beginning of Ruby

2007-10-16T16:16:00.002-05:00

Lesson Number One: There Is Such A Thing As Love At First Sight

We drove to the farm in Chesapeake, about fifteen minutes away from home, and promptly got lost on the country roads in the area. My impatience was annoying to both of us, and we finally stopped at a gas station so I could call the farmer for directions. He sounded as edgy as I, and after a quick turnaround, we finally made it to our destination.

The farmer welcomed us into his home and led us to a family room. I don’t remember much about the farmer himself other than his general gruffness, but he was friendly. We sat down, Jim on a chair and I on the floor, and waited with intense anticipation for him to bring this little girl to us. Suddenly there was a little scurry of activity, and we saw her. She was small, full of energy, and had floppy ears that were cuter than description. Her clumsily large paws seemed to indicate at first glance that she would grow to be a good-sized dog. She ran to us immediately, and I felt her softness for the first time. As I looked her over, I noticed first that although she was a tri-color beagle, she had unusual tiny black spots of fur mixed in with the white parts of her, similar to a Dalmatian. I said, “You said she’s all Beagle, right?” The farmer explained that she was indeed a pure bred Beagle, and that her distinctive markings were called “blue-ticking”, which was a sign of good ancestry. I didn’t know anything about it, but was satisfied with his answer. Then I noticed one of her most distinctive marks: just above her eyes on the top of her head was an oval-shaped spot of black fur. It looked positively regal…like a jewel? I felt a surge in my heart that told me we would not be leaving empty-handed.

I spent a few minutes playing with her on the floor as I asked the farmer several questions. There was one question I needed to ask which had deal-breaker potential written all over it, but I couldn’t leave without knowing. “Why is she the only puppy left from the litter? It’s unusual to see an ad in the paper for the last puppy left.” We were surprised to learn that she had been purchased by another family, but then returned. I began to worry, but continued my probe. “Why?” The answer resonated in my head for years after that night, and makes me smile every time I think about it. The farmer sat back in his chair and said, “Stupid city folks. They thought she came housebroken already.” We laughed at the silliness but after all these years we are so grateful to those “stupid city folks” for making it possible for us to take over.

The final test was yet to come: I had to convince Jim that this dog was for us. I looked over at him as he watched this funny little puppy play on the floor in front of him. He was trying to be the calm one, the reasonable one. He slowly leaned down and snapped his fingers to get the puppy’s attention. She bounded over to him immediately and he scooped her up in his arms. She nuzzled in his neck and licked his face, and as I sat there with my fingers crossed behind my back, willing some kind of chemistry to happen, the puppy did the “work” herself. Jim’s mouth widened into a smile, and as he looked down at me I knew I wouldn’t need to say any more. I raised my eyebrows, and he nodded. It was a done deal.

Click here for part 2!

Falling Behind On My Own Schedule

2007-10-15T18:51:00.000-05:00

Yikes.

I have taken a couple of days off due to a combination of having to work at the salon (what's that? oh yeah, my job!), not feeling well physically, and feeling mentally drained...I shouldn't have done that.

Now I have to pay the price for my sluggishness as I feel my mental lists creeping up on me...Yes, I even took a couple of days off from making my to-do lists! What was I thinking????

I have been reading a great book by a publishing industry expert that contains some fabulous ideas on marketing a book, and along with learning a bunch of things I didn't know before, I have collected some action items that I would be stupid not to try. I won't go into all of it right now, but one thing that has jumped to the near-top of my (mental) list is to make a "Review Sheet".

I had figured that I would just send a beautifully-written letter along with a copy of the book to each person I wanted a review from. This industry expert that wrote the book outlined how to do a "Review Sheet" that actually gets enclosed with the letter, giving even more details about my book and where to send a copy of the review (so I don't have to hunt for all of them!), etc. It made complete sense to me and also showed me how much more I have to learn. But, I enjoy a challenge and I am firm in my belief that this book will help so many families...so I keep plugging away!

So the "Review Sheet" is my assignment for tonight, along with some of my cover letters. Tomorrow will be 7 days since I placed my bulk book order, and I am hoping to receive them by the beginning of next week (I can hope, can't I???). I want to have everything ready so as soon as those books come in my door, a bunch of them can leave again without even staying for dinner. LOL

I'm off to check some items off my (mental) list! Wish me luck!

Anyone hungry?

2007-10-14T12:03:00.000-05:00

I have just been "tagged" by Kat of My Two Cents to answer these food questions. How fun is that? Yeah, yeah...I'll work on book stuff after I answer these questions. :)

In turn, I am tagging my sister Julie of House of Jules.

1. How do you like your eggs? Scrambled, poached, or fried.

2. How do you take your coffee/tea? I don't drink coffee. I like tea with milk and sugar on it, and preferably at tea time on a boat in the Bahamas,as I was over the summer with my son and the Boy Scout Troop.

3. Favorite breakfast food: Eggs and turkey bacon or, if my Mom is cooking, Belgian waffles, or if Julie is "cooking", hot dogs and papaya juice in New York City.

4. Peanut butter - smooth or crunchy? SMOOTH.

5. What kind of dressing on your salad? 1000 Island or Balsamic Viniagrette.

6. Coke or Pepsi? Coke Zero. Pepsi makes me queasy.

7. You’re feeling lazy, what do you make? Grilled cheese and potato chips.

8. You’re feeling really lazy. What kind of pizza do you order? Extra cheese with onions.

9. You feel like cooking. What do you make? Marinated Flank Steak, twice baked potatoes, and some kind of vegetable just so it looks like we're eating healthy stuff.

10. Do any foods bring back good memories? Fondue. Always good times!

11. Do any foods bring back bad memories? Liver. And although I like cole slaw, I always think of my Grandma's funeral when I eat it. And although I like broccoli, I always remember how, when we made our son eat it as a 4-year-old, he threw up all over the dinner plate.

12. Do any foods remind you of someone? Hmmm. Not really. Other than broccoli. (See #11)

13. Is there a food you refuse to eat? Liver.

14. What was your favorite food as a child? Why do I suddenly feel older than the hills? I can't remember! I always loved a good cheeseburger...

15. Is there a food that you hated as a child but now like? Fish

16. Is there a food that you liked as a child but now hate? No

17. Favorite fruit and vegetable: Fruit: probably watermelon or good strawberries. Vegetable: broccoli and corn, although I don't think that counts as one, really.

18. Favorite junk food: Any sweets, and movie popcorn that is contains more butter than any human should be allowed to eat.

19. Favorite between meal snack: potato chips

20. Do you have any weird food habits? no

21. You’re on a diet. What food(s) do you fill up on? vegetables and salad.

22. You’re off your diet. Now what would you like? Everything.

23. How spicy do you order Indian/Thai? Mild. I'm boring.

24. Can I get you a drink? Jack and Coke or a Margarita, depending on where I am and what we're eating.

25. Red or White Wine? White

26. Favorite dessert? Cheesecake or ice cream sundae

27. The perfect nightcap? Umm, hot cocoa?

Your turn, Julie!

Lazy Sunday...I mean SATURDAY

2007-10-13T16:18:00.000-05:00

I had intended to do so much today! Over the last couple of days I steamrolled through my goal of getting all those letters out (almost 100 of them), and it was my additional goal this weekend to write the letters that I will send (accompanied by copies of the book) to various places, asking for a review.

At this point in the day, however (it's 4:30 p.m.), I am feeling slightly wiped out by the intensity of this week. I think I will choose to iron instead of work on letters, and maybe even--the horror!--clean up the kitchen or something. I'll post more about my progress--and I WILL have made progress by then--tomorrow afternoon!

In the meantime, enjoy this video from Saturday Night Live.

The Label! (Can I Get a Drumroll?)

2007-10-11T07:37:00.000-05:00

I mentioned that I was picking up my fancy schmancy mailing labels from Julie last night, and I did. They are SO awesome; I just love them! Hopefully the label, combined with the red (Ruby red! Get it?) envelope, will make the recipients drop everything to find out what could be inside the gorgeous packaging. (It'll be my fancy schmancy business card, along with either a letter and a sales sheet for the book, or my fancy schmancy business card, along with a press release, which I color-copied for free, as you'll remember, from FedEx/Kinkos!)

Want to see the label? Here it is:

I covered up my address, so you'll have to use your imagination in that area.

Isn't it cool? Wouldn't YOU love to get something with a label this nice on it? Props to Julie; as usual, dazzling artwork. :)

I'm getting my pet boutique letters out today, as well as the rest of the press releases. I can't wait to get the other letters out! My goal is to have them in the mail by Saturday morning.

Have a great day! More later!

Just an Ordinary Day, I Guess...OR IS IT??

2007-10-10T07:57:00.000-05:00

Well, after the "whirlwind" of birthdays lately (ha ha: the last two days!) I was going to be sorry to say that it is nobody's birthday today--in my family, that is. Then I was checking a couple of the blogs I now read daily and discovered that it is Kat's Mom's birthday today! Woo hoo! So Happy Birthday to Kat's Mom!

I have added Kat's blog down there to the right, as well as Katie's and Karyn's. (It must be a good day for women whose names begin with "K"!) *LOL* Check them out when you get a few minutes!

Book news? I am picking up my fancy-schmancy mailing labels from Julie this evening (yes, she designed those, too!) so that I can begin mailing letters to different types of businesses: pet boutiques, pet cemetaries, vets, shelters, and various publications to try to get reviews as well.

I finished the pet boutique letters yesterday afternoon. I am starting in the Chi-town area with those and "oozing" outward. Today I am hoping to get the pet cemetary and shelter letters done, and then we'll see how long it takes me to do the rest.

I placed my bulk order for books yesterday, so I can take my time on the "Would you please review me" letters. There are probably a million--okay, that's exaggerating, sorry--vets in this area, so that will probably take me a while.

Busy times! I work at the salon this afternoon, tomorrow, and Friday, so I guess the book is going to get squeezed in during the early a.m.'s for the next couple of days! (and I'm starting the countdown to Friday...)

Happy Birthday, Dad!

2007-10-09T04:24:00.000-05:00

It's our Dad's birthday today! (which you would already know if you read the title of this post, but I thought I'd state it again.)

Dad is recovering from a hip replacement currently, and he is doing GREAT. He did a lap around the hospital floor he was on, on the afternoon he had the surgery done and he's been going going going ever since! I called him the day after surgery (Friday) and asked how he was doing; he said, "Great! I was just running around the hallways."

"REALLY?" I asked.

"Well, sort of...walking fast with the walker..."

It's that kind of hilarity that Julie and I (and the rest of the family) expect from Dad, and he rarely disappoints.

Obviously, Dad being my Dad, I have countless memories that I could share on this blog today. Unfortunately, the one that keeps popping itself up as the one I have to share first is how he ate Milk Bones in front of my friends when I was a teenager, to be "funny". I guess I don't have to add any detail to that...just let your mind do the rest. I was obviously horrified. But that's how he rolls. If you want the serious, pick another guy. If you want the Funny, choose my Dad.

Dad likes to be unpredictable, too. When I got a speeding ticket only months after getting my driver's license, I pulled Mom aside in the kitchen and told her about it. She was furious, and said the words that made me shudder: "YOU'RE going to have to tell your father." I went to bed, planning how I would tell him the next day in such a way that I would not be grounded from driving, but couldn't sleep because of the guilt. I got out of bed and went to where he was watching some tv show and slowly spit out my story, waiting for the hammer to come down.

"Well, you'll have to pay for it," he said.

"What?"

"I said, you'll have to pay for it. Hey, tickets happen. I get 'em, and I pay for them."

That was it.

I was so excited! Of course, his unpredictability went the other way, too: when I expected that something wouldn't be a big deal, well...it's his birthday. I don't have to give an example of that!

Another memory that stands out about my Dad is that, because of him, I still, at almost 39 years old, can call up in my memory the taste of dry washcloth in my mouth from the times when I had a really loose tooth that was hanging by a thread and he said, "Get me a washcloth. I'll pull it out."

Dad has managed hotels for years and Julie and I have benefitted greatly. When I was in fifth grade, I had my birthday party at the pool of the Holiday Inn Mart Plaza in Chicago.

In 6th grade, we lived (for the first part of the school year) at the Holiday Inn in Hurst, Texas.

We moved to Knoxville, Tennessee just before 8th grade and we lived at the Holiday Inn only about a mile from the site of the 1982 World's Fair. I had a cheeseburger from the restaurant almost every night for dinner, and we routinely went downstairs to bring sundaes up to our rooms for dessert. My friends loved being invited for sleepovers. But best of all, Julie and I knew what day of the week the video game guy would come to take the quarters out of the arcade machines. The hotel arcade was awesome; it had Pac Man, Centipede, Defender, Donkey Kong, and Burger Time. We would station ourselves in the arcade on that great day each week and wait for him, and he, probably "thrilled" to have groupies, set us up with tons of game credits before he left. Thanks Dad: because of you being a hotel manager and maintaing a game room, Julie and I had "Mad Skills" with the video games!

Julie and I were also exposed to lots of experiences that many kids weren't, besides having free reign over a hotel. We, being suburban children, took regular excursions to the city when Dad worked at the Ascot Hotel on Michigan Avenue and then the Holiday Inn Mart Plaza. We saw the museums, the parks, Buckingham Fountain, and more. We saw shows (the first one I remember is "Bubbling Brown Sugar", which we bought the soundtrack for. I can still hear it!) every now and then. Dad, along with Mom, also made it possible for me to participate in a CISV student interchange, in which we had a German visitor (Tina) stay with us for a month during the World's Fair, and then I stayed with her in Darmstadt Germany for a month the following year.

Although Dad has always been a television fan, sometimes our tastes don't see eye to eye. For example, wrestling. Ick. He used to watch that ALL of the time. I did, however, enjoy joining him in the family room when Roller Derby was on; that was always a good time. We also enjoyed shows like "All in the Family", "Emergency!", "Adam 12", and later, "Cheers" and "The Cosby Show".

As far as movies go, well, he'll watch almost anything. I do remember Julie and I getting into major trouble for watching "Mommie Dearest" one too many times. As an adult, I now understand why you wouldn't necessarily want your young daughters laughing and imitating the "NO MORE WIRE HANGERS" scene over and over again so I guess I should thank Dad for yelling at us...

Seriously though, that reminds me of the most important thing I think my Dad has taught me, and that is how to be a good parent. Mom and Dad had the bar set pretty high for us and we didn't always come through, but when we tried our best we knew they were proud of us because they told us so. Our parents still tell us they're proud of us, which is something that not too many thirty-somethings can say.

I see myself doing and saying many of the same things I was brought up with, and I know that it's working because the boys are growing up to be fabulous young adults. We eat dinner together 99% of the time, we spend time doing "family" activities, Jim and I try to be very involved with the boys' extra-curriculars, just as Mom and Dad always were with mine and Julie's...Although Dad and Mom don't live here, their values are helping to raise our family the right way, and that is something you can't put a price on.

So, in closing, I just want to say: Have a Happy Birthday, Dad! Don't get crazy and take a jog around the block or anything; watch some wrestling (ick) and enjoy yourself! We love you!

Author Copies!

2007-10-09T04:15:00.000-05:00

It must have been the Luck O' The Julie's Birthday, because my author copies of the book FINALLY arrived yesterday! Whee! Now that so many of my family and friends (and who knows how many strangers!) have the book, it was a little anti-climactic. However, I can now place my order for a stack of books that I can have on hand, which is very exciting.

Julie brought me a gift on Sunday that was a crazy kind of exciting: she had the book's logo (and blog masthead) put on the front of a t-shirt for me, with the blog address on the back. She also had a blank journal made with a cover that is my business card with a twist: instead of "Author", she put "Ink Slinger Extraordinaire", which is what I demand that my family call me in private (KIDDING.).

She may make the shirt and a journal (not like mine, but one for kids) available on our websites...so stay tuned!

Happy Birthday, Beautiful!

2007-10-08T06:33:00.001-05:00

Today is Julie's birthday. Holla! She's still the younger of the two of us (ha!). She can still say she's in her early thirties (barely), which is way more than I can do.

Being 4 years and 11 months apart, we had a naturally tumultuous relationship as little girls. I felt like she was always trying to get in my business and she felt like I was extremely bossy. Hmm. Maybe we were both right!

Being typically territorial, we spent lots of times standing with our toes right on the carpet line between the other sister's bedroom and the hallway, being extremely annoying but figuring it was okay because we didn't actually ENTER the room.

We did, however, band together when it was really important. Like when we got the Donny and Marie dolls. We put on lots of great stage shows with those things.

Or when we went nuts about the original Cabbage Patch Dolls, with our Mom leading the way. A Babyland General Hospital opened up in Knoxville, and our family became Xavier Roberts groupies, as you can see by this photo.
Mom even made an unintentionally creepy loaf of bread that resembled a Cabbage Patch baby head for him when he came to town to sign the butts of the dolls he created.

I brought her to school for show and tell when I was in 1st grade.

She was a big hit. Speaking of hits, the other thing that I had as part of my show and tell presentation was the Fisher Price clock that she bashed me in the head with during a car trip to Canada. (I don't remember which came first: the show and tell or the head bashing.)

We bonded under the big magnolia tree that was in front of our house in Knoxville. We spent hours on the weekends under the low branches of that thing, weeding what was sprouting up underneath. Those days of weeding instigated a lifelong disgust with gardening, so much so that Jim and Julie have had a running bet: she owes him a quarter if she EVER does yardwork again in her life. It wasn't until I saw the tree a couple of years ago and noticed that the current homeowners cut off the bottom branches and made it possible for two little girls to not have to crouch so low to do their weeding. Godspeed to the current children in that house! We paved the way...

Besides standing strong together on Remembering Ruby and all of the issues we overcame together with the book (I can't imagine having done this with anyone else), our other greatest time of banding together in the face of adversity was Black Thanksgiving. I won't go into the details too much, but we spent an entire Thanksgiving weekend taking inventory on our Mom's Beanie Babies, Cherished Teddies, Precious Moments figurines, and Hallmark ornaments. The Beanies were the killer, though. I can't go into it any more than that, or I might start crying and Julie might, also. It was a time we'll never forget, unfortunately.

In 1995, Julie, Mom, and I had our first Girls' Weekend. We went to the Mall of America and had a blast.

We shopped til we dropped, rode the roller coaster at Camp Snoopy, and it was then that I discovered--because of Julie's wise recommendation--that I looked fabulous in Coffee Bean lipstick by Revlon. (Thanks again!!)

Our next Girls' weekend was in New York City, as Julie had moved out there. Mom and I flew out and the three of us did all of the touristy stuff: Broadway shows (Three nights in a row: Ragtime, Grease, and Rent!), great food, the Empire State Building, Statue of Liberty, and the World Trade Center.

Julie eventually came back to the Chicago area, and now she lives only about 20 minutes from us. She is always there for us, as we are always there for her. She is like a second mom to the boys: she is the only one in the world who knows them as well as Jim and I do. And that's important, because it makes it three against two.

At one point, after the boys went through phases of calling her many things (Joo-ie, Aunt Noodie, Aunt Doody, just Julie, etc.), she told them, "Why don't you just call me Beautiful?" So they did, for a while.

Another of the many things that I absolutely love and appreciate about Julie is how she has shown me so many "little" things that I never would have discovered on my own, for example, parts of New York that only a local would be able to share. After I went out there the first time and did all the touristy stuff, future visits were taken up with more "normal" things. She introduced me to Kate's Paperie in SoHo

as well as (right across the street) the most beautiful grocery store in the world, Dean and Deluca.

We have enjoyed lemonade from Balthazar together,

hot dogs and papaya juice--for breakfast--from Gray's Papaya, every day for three days straight.

She has introduced me to her friends who are awesome people. She doesn't take friendship lightly; she works hard at it and the people she includes in her inner circle care about her just as much as she does them.

We have dined at the Miracle Grill in the Village a couple of times (her favorite restaurant!),

and we've spent hours outside stage doors waiting for autographs after the many shows we've seen together, both in NYC and Chicago. We came up short, however, when we braved the Chicago winter waiting for more than an hour for Matthew Broderick and/or Nathan Lane after "The Producers" previewed in Chicago. Jim, not being a fan of the cold OR waiting for autographs, was a great sport as he stood off to the side like he didn't know us. Matthew! Nathan! If you happen to read this, e-mail me or just make a comment. We'll forgive you IMMEDIATELY for avoiding the stage door; we're sure you were just afraid of the love that was going to come your way...

Here's a slightly startled Christina Applegate, signing our Playbills after "Sweet Charity" in Chicago.

One of the funniest memories in recent history involves New York and Broadway shows. Jim sent the two of us to New York for a long weekend in honor of our birthdays last fall and, after seeing "Avenue Q" and getting our Playbills autographed,

we walked down the street to look for a bite to eat. We came upon a big row of posters and signs advertising the shows that were current Broadway shows. The first one was for Martin Short's show. We suddenly decided it would be hilarious to pose in front of these signs just like we do in front of the shows we really attend. We stopped a couple who was walking by and asked them to take a photo of us in front of Martin's sign, and they obliged.

"Yes, we imagine the show was WONDERFUL!"

We spent the next 30 minutes posing in front of various signs as if we were part of the picture and, I'm sorry to say, you're just going to have to believe me when I tell you that it was one of the funniest things ever. I guess some of what happens in NYC stays in NYC.

Julie is a great cook, too. She is not afraid to try new recipes, and our family has been the grateful beneficiary of many a gourmet meal. She has brought unbelievable culinary delights into our house, like Emeril's Italian Chicken with Spaghetti Bordelaise, Swiss Cheese Bread, Fruitastic Salad, and most recently a menu full of Mexican recipes that would have delighted any restaurant owner. (Yum. I think I'm STILL full.)

Though she's a fixture in the kitchen, the place you will find her more often than not is behind the camera.

She has photographed our boys within minutes after birth and every life stage from that point on (and her friends' weddings and children as well!). Her talents have given us the gift of being able to look at thousands and thousands of photographs and call up memories immediately as we do so.

Many of my greatest life memories involve this chick who was always my sister by blood, but now I am proud to call her my friend by choice. She is the best aunt any kid could ask for, not only to my boys but to the kids of her friends as well. She is full of life and really knows how to have fun or, as my friend Kate would say, "make her own party". She is thoughtful, caring, and generous both with resources and time. She is a blessing to her family and all of her friends.

Julie, Happy Birthday. You are more special than you could ever imagine, our sister, sister-in-law, aunt, and friend. Our birthday wish for you can be summed up in this photo from Dylan's Candy Bar in NYC:

We love you!

Torn Between Two Emotions, Feelin' Like a Fool...

2007-10-06T21:48:00.000-05:00

I just went to check the book's Amazon listing as I do from time to time, to see how it's ranked.

Wait.

Back up. (Beep Beep Beep Beep)

I have some information that will be helpful for you to know before I go on.

I e-mailed Amazon a couple of days ago to request that they place the book under the subheading "Books > Children's Books > Issues > Pet Death" rather than just under "Books > Children's Books > Ages 4-8" or whatever it was under before. This is obviously the right category for it. This won't be news to you unless you are a new visitor to my blog--WELCOME, by the way, if you are!--and haven't read anything else on this page before digging right in to today's entry...

Besides being the right category, having any book in a more specific "home" should help the marketing effort tremendously. After all, if I'm going to Amazon to look for a book about, let's say the comedic stylings of Ben Stiller, I'm going to look in the entertainment section rather than just non-fiction.

But I digress.

Anyway, I was overjoyed, upon checking the listing just now, to see that Amazon went with my wishes--don't you LOVE when that happens?--and that my book is number 8 in that category. Woo hoo!

Ah yes, back to the title of this post. Everytime I get excited about good news regarding the book, my inner voice pulls me back just a little bit. This IS a book partly about death after all (and yes, the living beyond it). As total strangers start to buy the book, nine times out of ten it will be because an animal has died. Yikes. That's sort of heavy, don't you think?

This has been such an emotional journey to begin with; I'm really going to have to get through this inner struggle (Julie is probably reading this, laughing right now because I have conversations with myself all the time) and keep remembering the reason I wrote this book in the first place: to help other families who are going through the same pain that my family went through.

Ahh. I feel better already. Thanks, Me!

The Stories Keep Coming...

2007-10-05T21:57:00.000-05:00

One of the best things about having written this book and sharing the news about it with others is that people share their own doggie memories with me. (That's a sad thing about having written this book, too--to talk to people who are still struggling after their loss)

Tonight I spoke with a really nice family who I am just coming to know after being in the same community with them for years. The mom was telling the grown son that I had written this book, and that she couldn't read it just yet, as their little dog Cody just passed this year and she didn't feel ready. This woman had already shared with me the story of Cody's passing a couple of weeks ago via e-mail right after she read my post about "Messages from Beyond"; she had an eerie experience like that on the day Cody died.

Anyway, when she told her son (and husband) about my book, her son's face lit up and he started telling me about his memories of Cody, who he described as his "best friend." He was full of joy in speaking about his late companion, and it was really great to watch his facial expressions as he spoke. Memories really do carry you through.

Great Feedback, Book Signatures, and HI DAD!

2007-10-04T20:21:00.000-05:00

I am getting wonderful feedback from those friends and family who have ordered and received the book (of course, I also wouldn't necessarily expect that my friends and family would tell me that the book stinks, either!). It's so great to hear from everybody as their books trickle in.

I put my business cards out at the salon yesterday, and am planning to bring a bunch of copies to the Fall Festival we're having on November 11. Dawn (salon owner) thought it would be fun to offer copies and have a mini book-signing. So, we're going to try it!

My current issue (because I always need to be working through some issue!) is that I'm trying to figure out what to write when I sign the books. People are starting to ask me to sign their copies, and these aren't all people who have lost a pet. I am having a hard time with this. I can come up with many caring and sincere things to write in a book for someone who has lost a pet, but what about for those who are either just really supportive of Julie, me, and the book and bought a copy (or copies!) or for the random future stranger who buys one because they like the story and see value in reading it to a child whether or not there has been a loss? I mean, what do other beginning authors do? Suggestions, anyone? Jim thinks there has to be a website out there somewhere for this very issue...but I don't have the time at this moment to research it. I'll keep you posted. In the meantime, leave me a comment if you can help me out! (or even if you can't!)

Lastly for today, I wanted to give a big SHOUT OUT to our Dad. He just had surgery today, and everything went really well, so we're thrilled. Hi Dad! We love you!

Scooooooore! (And, by the way, go to your local FedEx/Kinkos!)

2007-10-02T21:37:00.000-05:00

For the ten+ years we've lived in this town, we have had to drive about 20 minutes to get to the nearest FedEx/Kinkos store, for copies. It has been a pain, because this town has about 1,000 of everything else, but only two FedEx/Kinkos, 20 minutes east of me and 20 minutes southeast of me.

Lo and behold, the higher-ups at FedEx/Kinkos decided to do something for my part of town (finally!), and they built one just a couple of blocks from my neighborhood (YAY!).

I stopped in a couple of weeks ago to send a fax and to tell the manager, who I recognized from one of the other stores, how happy I was that they finally opened a FedEx/Kinkos closer to me. I felt like a real nerd, but couldn't contain the excitement. Plus, I could be wrong here, but I think I may have made his day.

After teaching my class this morning, I headed to the nearest FedEx/Kinkos, which was not the one near me, to enlarge a sign I made into a poster for the elementary school LMC. Their poster enlarger wasn't working, but on my way out I noticed something on the counter: something bright and shiny, as if an aura was around it, beckoning me to come hither.

Nah, not really. It was a flyer. A glorious flyer: announcing that today--YES, TODAY--was the Grand Opening celebration of MY FedEx/Kinkos! They were having specials every hour and as luck would have it, during that very hour they were offering FREE poster enlargements! At MY FedEx/Kinkos!

You know where I'm going here. Actually, you know where I went. To get that FREE poster enlargement!

But the story gets even better.

From 5 p.m. to 6 p.m. at MY FedEx/Kinkos, they were offering FREE color copies!! Who does that? They cost .89 each!

So I scurried home and printed out my press release, the flyer for the elementary school that I have to deliver tomorrow, as well as an ad with those tear-off phone number thingies at the bottom. At 5 p.m. sharp, I went back to FedEx/Kinkos and said, "Free color copies right now, right?" The guy said, "Yep. You know there's a limit of 3, right?" Feeling immediately dejected, I said, "Oh. Okay."

Then he laughed and said, "Just kidding. Make as many as you want."

I was the only person there! How great is that? All told, I made about 160 color copies. What a savings! So please, find YOUR FedEx/Kinkos and go there! They are awesome!

Thanks for your time and attention.

Updates

2007-10-02T14:19:00.001-05:00

I just checked Barnes and Noble online, and the book is once again available there. (Yay!) Of course, if you're not a member at B&N, isn't is just easier to click on that button down there to the right? You don't even have to leave this page.

Also, I hesitantly announce that my author copies from the publisher ARE indeed on their way in the next 48 hours. I received an e-mail from them this morning, thanking me for my patience. It was really no problem. If I am nothing else, I am an extremely patient person.

I am.

Really.

Okay, okay, you got me. I'm not.

But I've waited this long; I can certainly wait a few more days!

Card-carrying Author

2007-10-02T06:07:00.000-05:00

My business cards arrived yesterday. (By the way, we use Vistaprint for many things: I highly recommend them!) Julie designed those, as well. They are awesome; they are set up vertically and they look just like the book cover.

The exciting part is that after my name comes the title of "Author". Still feels weird!

I went crazy last night, handing them out at the parent meeting for our Boy Scout Troop. I will probably go crazy at the health club today too, as I have a class to teach; so if you're at Healthtrack, look out for flying business cards!

Back to Elementary School...

2007-10-01T08:37:00.000-05:00

I just paid a visit to my sons' former elementary school, to donate a copy of the book to the LMC (Library Media Center: because 21st century school libraries contain so much more than books!). I absolutely LOVE this school. My boys attended this school from Kindergarten through 5th grade. I volunteered as the room mom every year except for one, and dabbled in other committees also. The entire diverse community of teachers, staff, students, and parents was/is so very tightly knit and it's such a welcome place. Besides the high standards of education held here, the teachers and staff offer so much more; they definitely impacted our family as I'm sure they did many others.

Mrs. J had both of my kids in 2nd grade--different years, of course. She is just one of the dynamic, energetic, caring teachers on staff. She tries to maintain a reputation that she is the "meanest" teacher at the school, but only succeeds in fooling the kids until they attend her class on the first day, because she is so fun!!

Mr. G had my older son for 3rd grade and, later, my younger one for math. He actually invited his entire 3rd grade class to his wedding that year!

Mrs. W had my younger son for 4th grade. She is a no-nonsense woman: doesn't take any "business" from anyone. At the time, she was PERFECT for him. One of the things I loved about her is that if my son had a problem he wanted to talk about, she was more than willing to meet with him (and sometimes, me too!) before school. She gave him so much respect and always made sure he knew she was listening to him, and they worked together on solutions.

Mr. R had my younger son for 5th grade. He lives practically in the school's backyard. He taught my son a lot about negotiating the delicate relationship issues between 5th grade boys and girls. (He did a lot of refereeing that year!)

Mrs. M had my older son for 5th grade. In addition to having a great year, he had the chance to audition for the Nicole Kidman movie "Birth", because Mrs. M received info on the casting call and thought he should try out for it. (Needless to say we're glad he didn't get that particular movie...but auditioning was an experience that not too many kids get, and definitely unforgettable. He no longer reads scripts.LOL)

On my way in, I stopped to see the school receptionist, who has been there for a really long time. She once told me that she remembers my 15 year old coming in to see her at the office on a regular basis as a kindergartner, not because he had a stomach ache or some other problem, but just because he wanted to visit the office. (Awww...cute!) She told me that I can make some flyers to hand out to the teachers and support staff. Yay!

I then spoke with the LMC Director, whom I had not met previously. She thanked me for the book and is allowing me to create a poster to, err, post in the LMC so the kids walking through will know it's there. We chatted for a few minutes and then I walked through the halls to the front door, checking out the student art that hung in the hallways along the way. It seemed like only yesterday that we were a new family at this school, and now that's all in the rear view mirror. Time flies.

I'm sure you can see why I decided to put this school on top of my priority list when it came to marketing this book. Yes, the student age group is right. Yes, the LMC Director is very friendly. What it really boils down to for me though, is that I feel supported here; I feel comfortable here. And even though it's been 2 years since my younger son left, they welcomed me back today with open arms and were genuinely happy for my accomplishment. It doesn't get much better than that!

Barnes & Noble: Out of Stock!

2007-10-01T08:33:00.000-05:00

I found out over the weekend that Barnes & Noble online is out of stock on Remembering Ruby, so currently the only major bookseller you can order it from is Amazon (see that direct link on the right side of this page?). Thanks to everyone who has purchased the book so far!

I'll keep you posted on when it is again available at B&N.

More later!

Celebrate Good Times...Come ON!

2007-09-29T22:47:00.000-05:00

So today was the big Celebration Day that I posted about on Thursday. Julie and I hopped into her car and took a little trip to downtown Chicago to a relatively new establishment, one that we thought would be perfect for the occasion.

It's called (drumroll, please!)

The Reagle Beagle!

Yes, that's spelled properly. The owner named/spelled it after the bar on "Three's Company." (For my UK friends, "Three's Company" was based on your show "Man About the House".)

What a fun time we had! This little bar/lounge is located on Grand, just off Michigan Avenue. The walls were covered with cast photos from television shows covering mainly the 1970's but also the 1980's (I think I saw a few from the 1960's thrown in there, as well!) The whole place was warmly decorated, like a modern version of a 70's living room. Alf was there too. The servers kept moving him from the bar to a seat in front of the fireplace, just for fun.

We took care of business first: ordering drinks. Julie went for the Love Boat Lemonade--after reading on the menu that Isaac would be preparing it, asked our server if she would do the same thing Isaac does in the opening theme (go to 1:22). It was delicious. The ingredients? Ketel 1 Citron, lemonade, and grenadine float. (Julie believes there was also some "cruise ship love" in there, but it can't be confirmed.) I ordered the Tootie and Blair's Cranberry and Pear. (Absolut pear, vodka, cranberry, and 7-up) YUM.

That taken care of, we took this photo of a photo of our own Reagle Beagle (Bijoux/the real Ruby, aka the Queen) next to the book, the bar logo, and a candle that just happenned to be already lit and on our table.

Then Julie took the official "author de-stressing" photo of me:

Then we kept going with the photos, through our Cheese Fondue appetizer, our Beagle Burger dinner (not made from beagles; don't worry: they were "fancied up" hamburgers), and our chocolate fondue dessert. It's almost like you were there, right?

We're definitely going back. (We still have to try the Vinnie Ba-Ba-Ba-Ba-Ba-Ba-rita and the Brady Bunch Punch.)

Just Breathe...

2007-09-28T18:27:00.000-05:00

I'm feeling a little overwhelmed today. I have letters to write, ads to construct, and lists of lists to make (Really! Those of you who know me will not be surprised at that).

The family just left a while ago for their overnight camping trip.

"So, wow, what are you going to do all evening, all by yourself," Jim asked me as they were leaving, "write some of those letters?"

"I was," I replied. "I changed my mind."

The advertisements and letters (easier typed up the first time on the computer rather than writing by hand and then transferring to Microsoft Word later) will wait until tomorrow. Rather, I enjoy making a good list and then crossing items off. In fact, I might make a list of what I already did today and then cross it all off, just for giggles (Really! Those of you who know me will not be surprised at that, either!). Then I'll get only half-serious about the rest of the lists. The great thing about marketing this book by myself--with my right-hand gal Julie--is that I am on my own schedule. I've been tightly wound for more than a week. Time to relax, at least for an evening!

So, I decided, to get things started on the right foot so to speak, to take Roxie for a walk. She was flabbergasted, if that's possible for a dog. Normally I walk her in the mornings--no later than lunchtime! She was so excited to get outside and sniff around. Once she gets hot on the trail of something like a rabbit, she bays and howls like she's being stabbed. It's quite embarrassing, and our friends who live on the next block sometimes say, "Yeah, we heard you outside with Roxie." (The commotion she causes is so loud that I can't take her on early morning walks, for fear of being asked to move out of our neighborhood!) By the way, as she appears in my posts somewhat frequently, I should share a photo of Roxie:

(What a poser. Believe it or not, I had absolutely NOTHING to do with the positioning of the pillows around her. I just called her name before I snapped the photo, and this is what I got!)

Anyway, after our walk, I made myself a lovely dinner. The evening is so peaceful...so far, so good. I feel so much more relaxed than I did about 2 hours ago. In fact, I'm closing this post out. Time for me to get my 'jammies on and curl up on the couch with my dog...and my spiral notebook.

My Author Copies...

2007-09-27T18:35:00.000-05:00

...still haven't arrived. Wahh. HOWEVER, the two copies that I finally just purchased from myself through Amazon came about five minutes ago! (Amazing.) Yippee! I'm hoping to get the author copies by the holidays.
LOL...I'll keep you posted.

I've been carrying my friend D's copy of the book around since she loaned it to me last Saturday. I'm feeling very guilty about it, but she assures me that because she is in the middle of a whirlwind of activity including having to write a paper for school that is due Saturday (which she, a busy mom of 2 who also substitute teaches, thinks she may have to pull an all-nighter in order to finish), she doesn't have time to sit and swaddle it in a blanket and look at it all day like I do (okay, okay...she didn't say THAT, and I'm not doing THAT, but I tend to have a dramatic flair and I think that adds to the story), and is happy that I can show her copy off to everyone I see.

I had to run all kinds of errands today, which meant "Yay!" for the family because I was getting stuff done (and "Yay!" for Roxie, who is Bijoux/Ruby's successor, because we went for a nice, long walk), but "BOOOOOO!" for me because I only got a couple of e-mails sent out to promote the book.

Jim and the boys are going camping tomorrow night through late Saturday, so I'll have all kinds of time tomorrow evening and Saturday to work. (Looking forward to checking some stuff off my list!)

I am REALLY looking forward to Saturday night, because Julie and I are headed downtown (I LOVE going downtown: could live there in a minute!) to have our "Two Sisters Celebrating The Completion of a Book!" party. We are going to the Perfect Place, but I'm not telling you today where that is. You'll have to wait for me to post about it either late Saturday night or Sunday. And yes, there will be photos in the post. Anyone familiar enough with Chicago to venture a guess as to where we're going? It's not this place, or this one. Guesses, anyone??

Watson

2007-09-26T08:28:00.001-05:00

Those of you who have "eagle eyes" may have already noticed, but I have added another blog link down there to the right. I found Linda through Beverley Cuddy's blog yesterday. She has a blog that documents her beloved dog Watson's diagnosis of and passing from Canine Lymphoma. I started reading it from the beginning and it is heartwrenching to say the least, partly because it brings up memories of my own. Her blog brings up a questions that pet owners will debate probably forever regarding cancer treatment in animals. What I adore about her writing is that her love for Watson absolutely seeps through. Visit her!